Gissele: So welcome to another episode of the love and compassion podcast. Don’t forget to like and subscribe to support our show. Are you struggling with money? You want to change your relationship with money so that you can attract more abundance into your life?
If so, then this is the episode. Yeah. Ken Honda is a bestselling self-development author in Japan, also called the Zen millionaire with book sales, surpassing 8 million copies since 2001. Now he is sharing his work with English speaking readers in the United States in Canada and beyond. His latest book called happy money.
The Japanese art of making peace with your money teaches us how to finally shift our relationship with money to be more positive and loving. Please welcome Ken Honda.
Ken: Hello there. I’m so honored to be on your show and thank you
Gissele: We are very honored that you’re here. I love your books.
I read Maro Up as well as Happy Money.
Ken: Oh really? Thank you.
Gissele: Yeah, I love your books. Money is something that impacts everyone. Everyone can relate to having either issue with money. Either people had an abundance of money or didn’t have or working towards money. I’m wondering if you can share a little bit about what got you interested in.
Ken: Yeah, it’s a long story, but to make it very short, I was born into a unique family. You know, I think overall people don’t talk about money over a dinner table. But my father was a very successful tax accountant. So my name was offering a topic over a dinner in my house. So, he used, he started teaching me about money since I was like four or five.
And when I was seven or eight, my father, started teaching me about Roe and ROI and,
I call it money IQ and money EQ. So, it’s not just only knowledge about money investing, tax laws, but at the same time, you need to have, money, high money IQ, which is emotional health with money. So even though you have a high IQ, if you don’t have high EQ, you could end up losing everything.
And I’m sure you’ve heard of a story of a, a lottery winner. They just spend all the money,
Gissele: Yeah. And it’s so interesting that I’ve seen that experience and also read it in your book about it explained to me why that happens.
Why people think that, oh, if I only win the lottery, then my money problems will be solved. And a lot of lottery winners usually tend to end up losing it as well as very rich celebrities. And so, I think it’s that that money IQ versus money EQ that you say is so important. Can you tell me why, money EQ is a little bit more important than money IQ?
Ken: I think money EQ is a solid, foundation, and if you don’t have a solid foundation of emotional intelligence, even though you’re a smartest kid in the class that doesn’t guarantee you will be the, the, the most successful in life. If you don’t have a sort of social skills and people skills and especially, emotional stability with you, you may make so much money, but, and you end up in a, drug rehabilitation center.
You know, a lot of celebrities, do because they don’t know how to cope with their emotions. So, even though you are sex, super successful, if you don’t know how to deal with your emotions, you might as well, being a mediocre person and stay very happy and keep smiling.
And that’s my idea.
Gissele: That’s funny. And it’s so, so, true. It explains a lot of the human behavior. I love in your book, how you talk about, you know, there’s, I mean, we have this concept of money as being kind of this paper thing that helps with transactions and at the base of it, it is what it is when you go deeper in defining money.
Can you define for our listeners what money really is? And how to, yeah, sorry, go ahead.
Ken: Well, I often teach kids, about money, because kids’ kind of understand more about money because they don’t have any, official knowledge about money. So, I talked to thousands of people all the time and I asked them, so what is money?
And so, you know, they, they think of paper and coins, for example, and I’m sure everything these days is online. So, okay. So, my, so your numbers on your, online digital numbers that’s money. So, what about credit cards? Okay. It’s a little plastic thing. Right. But does that mean that it’s money?
You know, that, it’s interesting. So, like 20, 30% of the people think it’s not no money. I think it’s just a plastic thing. I can use money, but it’s sort of like, it’s not money. Right. So, w what is apple pay? You know, so what is iPhone? Is this money? some kids say, yeah, it’s my name, because, you know, you can use it for money.
And so people are kind of start to wonder and start looking confused. So, what about,
So, my, passion has been to teach people about money and also transform. Yeah, their relationship with money and it’s so much fun. I really enjoy looking at, the confused faces. When I ask questions. My teaching is very based on Zen. So, I ask questions instead of, I teach. So, certain questions can take you to, a deeper philosophical world about money in life.
And at the end of the tunnel, you just, think about how, how you want to live your life, because money can take you such to a, such a deep place in life.
Gissele: Yeah. Thank you for sharing that. I, I have heard that money is really just energy that you you’re shifting around with people and so, there in, so it’s an energetic exchange and it sort of helps because.
It, it, it helped me shift my perspective. Cause you know, growing up in, thank you for mentioning children growing up, we did definitely did not talk about money at the table. It was sort of hush, hush. She was sort of like keeping my parents really didn’t talk about, I was taught to really always like save, save, save war card and the hardest you work, the more you’re going to have an I saw my parents worked very hard, didn’t ended up millionaires.
I mean there were barely, there are abundant in other ways and so I, I grew up with that kind of belief with my children. I didn’t really talk about money much when they were littler, in I’m gonna share a confession if you may.
As I was reading your book, you had talking about kids and being able to be transparent with them. And I recognize that my kids are constantly asking me for stuff. They’re like, I want this, I want that. And what I noticed in my responses were like, you’re asking too much or that’s a waste of money and then as I, as I pondered what you had put in your book, I realized it’s not about what they’re asking.
It’s how I’m feeling about giving. I feel like I’m giving too much. I feel like I’m be like, you know, cause I have my business and you know, we’re doing renovations. And so, what I did and so health, thank you for this. I shifted my conversation with my kids and said, you know, I’m feeling overwhelmed by the amount of money I’m spending right now, the amount of money coming in and out.
I want to do this for you, but I don’t want to do it when I’m feeling this way. So, for me, that kind of shifted the conversation. And I mean, it was kind of there, it’s kind of a little bit surprised because it became about me and my, in my emotions towards not about something that they were doing, which in the past had been. Right.
Ken: Yeah. So, I wrote a few books on, how, how to teach kids about money. You know, I, I have to, to start translating in those books in English, but you know, to summarize, if you can teach kids, about money as, money can be your best friend. He, or she will have a totally different life because once you know, like money can help you,
instead of like a gigantic monster that seems to drive our parents crazy. Right. Because people can get it, you know, kids get it so well when they are talking about watering the plants, your mom may not be upset, but if you just, if you just waste your money from her eyes, she gets, incredibly upset.
So, I think probably about money issues, your parents can be most upsetting. So, I have never seen my mother upset so much, about money. Nothing else. She is such a gentle soul.
I think I wanted to spend my money for joy. Yeah, but I felt like I was denied. So
Gissele: yeah, I mean, I can, I can totally relate to that. I came from a household where, my mother grew up in poverty so for them, money was always a significant thing. Right? they had to move a lot if they if they weren’t able to make rent. And so, for my mother, having the security of a safety net was very key.
So, if you were ever to use credit cards or get into debt it was a Cardinal sin, because you didn’t want to get to that position where you were, potentially at risk. Right. So, I grew up with a lot of money issues and that’s why I became kind of a high achiever to be able to get an education in order to be able to make money.
Gissele: I didn’t realize how this fear about money was negatively impacting my ability to attract money.
Ken: Yes, yes.
Gissele: because, because I had all these, misconceptions money’s bad because then cause there was also the other part of it that greed, right? That people who are really have extraordinary abundance are like really greedy and they’re doing it on the backs of other people. So, money’s bad.
So I was wondering what the most common money blocks are and maybe how to overcome them.
Yeah. So, you know, it’s so interesting because I, I’ve been doing this for decades, right. At least two decades as an author and a 10 more years as a consultant. So I have, probably impacted millions of people over the years.
And, personally, I’ve go, tens of thousands of testimonials myself so, a little shift in head and little shift in your heart can turn everything around, especially about receiving. We are so good at giving help giving money, giving ourselves, but we are so bad at receiving, you know, we have a PhD in giving a week.
We’re not even in kindergarten and in receiving, so, this guilt of receiving because, when we feel funny about it, money, how can you receive with a big smile on your face? It’s like, it’s terrible, you know, or this, you should look like grim when, when you received money. So,
So, instead if you can let go of all the guilt shame, embarrassment, resentment and let, let money go walk as a free free person. You will just start having a beautiful relationship. So the first question I always ask to my audience is if money was a person who would it be to be a very kind, generous, loving person or money, it could be a huge monster, mean, you know, horrendous, like gigantic monster who could hurt you, your parents, your, your kids, or your neighbors, or like, you know, it could drive people crazy and commit crimes or money can be your best friend who can help you.
Well, whatever you want to do in your life. So, if money become your best friend, I think you’re so lucky. But, it takes a little while to, to, to just let go of all the feelings because we’ve been hurt. That’s why, I mean, teaching and helping people to heal money owns that we’ve accumulated over the years.
And, unfortunately, our hearts are so, you know, so many, hurts, since we earth four or five, we didn’t know anything about money when we were four, but by day nine or 10, we know that, you know, we want money. So, I think anywhere, it doesn’t really matter if you’re in Europe, China, Australia, Africa, Northern south America.
Everybody little kids, they don’t care about money, but when they, when they’re eight or nine, give me my ID. Right. And they’re almost like little, little criminals, threatening their parents. And so, I heard, you know, I heard horrible statements about money. I don’t know, as well as very cute ones.
The cute one goes, from, from seven-year-old boy saying, mom, you have to get me money. Otherwise, I’m not going to study, you know, really knows that it’s almost like bank robbery. You know, I demand this kind of the cute stuff, but where, where did it get? You know, the idea is like that, you know, they get it from the movies, and I think it must be up in the air and otherwise you’re a seven-year-old boy.
It would never say such a thing.
Gissele: That is so funny. My, my son had asked me for a credit card. He’s like, oh, can I have a credit card? It’s like, we got a lot of talk about it. And I did give me an opportunity to have a conversation with him about how credit works.
Ken: Yes, yes, yah, no limit please. Right?
Gissele: Yes. That’s right. No limit and no payback, no interest.
Ken: hahahaha. Yeah. For kids, because it looks like a magical thing that we can, and then you can just swipe.
Gissele: It just comes. You just get that. You can just get that, It’s magical when your kids, it’s it, you know, you were talking about receiving and it’s interesting because, even in some of the work, when you get into kind of a spiritual work and when you’re doing like compassionate work, like kind of a stuff that we do, it kind of gets challenging to think about, you know, pricing your products when you want everyone to head off to it.
It gets really challenging to do both the spiritual work and the love and compassion work
It feels sometimes hard to put that idea together as something that, because in your book you say money is neither good or bad, it’s just is right. And so, it’s the attributes we assigned.
Ken: Yes, exactly.
You said it right? money is interesting stuff. Money itself is neutral, but we give it a meaning. You know, money can be a good money can be bad. That’s why you’re confused because we give meaning to something which, which doesn’t have any. So, you know, money is not either good or bad, which, then idea comes in.
So, people said, think according to what they believe. So, you know, after my lecture in an hour, my student sometimes comes up and said, so money, money is good, right. You know because he wants to believe money is good. And the other one says, so you’re saying is money bad? You know, no, no, no, no.
I didn’t say that. I didn’t say money either good or bad money is just neutral energy. So please don’t suffer from this energy because it’s a life force energy, you know, you can turn it into anything. That’s what it’s so beautiful about money. So, if you can look at money as it is, that’s a good start.
Gissele: One of my favorite sayings in an I, you know, I’ve been, I’m so grateful to be able to talk to you. Cause I’ve been wanting to ask you this question for a while. I had once heard you say money at first is like ice. So, it’s hard to come by then. It’s like a river, it flows. And then when you, I guess when you reach your full abundance, it’s like air everywhere.
Gissele: Can you talk a little bit about how we can make money? Like air always there when we need it?
Ken: So, if you’re living in a cold, cold world, you see people are mean to each other. People are cold, people are freezing, so they’re scared too. And if money is ice, it’s, it could be pointy, you know, it freezes your fingers and it’s not fun.
And it, it’s not fun to have money because he just freezes your fingers. And so, when you live in a warmer climate, you know, money is like water, water flowing like river. If the water is too much, that causes flood. And if the water is too little, it causes a drought and also mountain fire, you know, it’s so, sad to see some parts of the country.
There’s a lot of floods in China, in Germany. Thousands of people die and drown. And on the other hand, like in California, and I heard recently in Canada, there is this mountain fire and,
So, I think a planet is screaming that, you know, we cannot, human, cannot stay distant. But going, going back to the, the topic. So, when you live in a warmer climate, you know, it’s, it’s not, super cold and warmer and, money evaporates, right. And then when money, evaporates, evaporates, it’s up in there.
So abundant, you know, I, I’m sure you’ve never worried about breathing. Like, you know, oh, today I have, I don’t have enough oxygen in my, in my house, you know, unless you’re stuck in an elevator or basement somewhere, you don’t worry about air because it’s abundant. And so, money is like that for financial independent people, you don’t really care about money anymore.
For example, I don’t care about my work if I get paid probably half of what I do. I don’t get paid. I do it pro bono. I do it for fun. I have, you know, I’m on shows like this for, in those, in those, in my friends. So, I don’t get paid. And for the other one, I get paid, but I don’t care anymore.
So, I don’t, tell the difference because, everything is fun for me. So, money is everywhere. whenever I need money, I just, click on some numbers and, and that is taken care of. So, you know, if I want to fly somewhere, the ticket is there and the hotel, and when I need a house, I can buy one.
You know, and if I can, if I want to help somebody, I can send money in two seconds. So money is almost like, you know, the genie in the magic lamp. like when I just, I don’t even have to, you know, scrub it. I just say genie, please. And then in two seconds, he or she, can do wonders for us.
Gissele: That’s some great instant manifestation there.
Ken: Yeah. So,
uh, ideal situation is that you don’t have to think about money anymore. So if money becomes the air, you focus on what you want to do in the day. And then at the end of the day, you feel like, oh, I’ve had so much fun. You know, I, I, I’ve probably helped this person, that person.
And I always, think of, readers, who read my books, somewhere in the world. I appreciate them for buying my book. And I’m just hoping that it helped them and, praying for their,
Because I, it makes me feel so full and, full of appreciation that I’m in the flow of happy money. Because I know, I have helped a lot of people on that day. And I only received money from happy customers. Everything I do has has a money back guarantee. So, whoever is not satisfied, I’ll give back the money.
So, so in other words, all of the money I receive is the result of making somebody happy,
Gissele: I love that. The title of your book is called happy money, what makes it happy.
Ken: When you received money, a lot of people feel resentment and also, shame because that’s too little to pay all the bills, but instead you can thank the money coming in.
Thank the people who gave the money to you. And if you’re a freelance coach, for example,
And if you can appreciate them more, they feel appreciated. So, they, they bring their friends. So, appreciation is a key thing, thanking the money, thanking the people who give,
So, for example, if you enjoy meal at the end of the meal, you paid the money. When you pay that money, thank the waitress and waiting per person, for the service. So, by saying thank you, you can really receive the benefits or the services, and just, it gives you a such a warm feeling.
And the little challenges, people, but say what, the pitfalls my mentor, Wahei Takeda who is called the Warren Warren Buffett of Japan. He said, if you can smile and write a check to government, you, you become the master of happy money. So, you know, if you have a choice and because we have no choice about paying taxes, right? So, do we do that with resentment, or do I do that with a smile on your face?
Because you know, our government is not the most functioning most, sufficient, you know, organization, but they do some good to, they help single parents or they help people, who are in need. they’re paying police people and also, people at the hospital there, they just,
So, if you can appreciate, them, for the service that brings you a smile. So instead of just getting upset, why I have to pay that, you have to pay it anyway. So, do I want to do that with a smiling face or not? You have a choice. So, by saying goodbye to money with a smile and say, it’s almost like saying your best friends at the airport or at a railway station.
Oh, when you say goodbye, they say, thank you for staying thank you for coming. Come back very soon with your friends. So if you can tell that to your money, you know, thank you for staying with me, come up with lots of friends, you know, you just say goodbye, but come back soon with a lots of friends, you know, money can hear you say once again, if money was a person they feel appreciated.
Oh, okay. I think I have to go back to the sale because she was so nice to me. And maybe I should, you know, bring bunch of my friends and just visit her. She’ll be so super happy to see me again. So, money was a person don’t you think? he or she, or it will feel that way.
Gissele: Yeah, absolutely. What you love, loves you back, right?
Ken: yeah, and it’s fun too.
Gissele: Yeah, I’ve been doing the, arigato, every time I pay out or when I receive super grateful, when I go out and do anything, when I get a bill, sometimes I forget, then I’ll do it after the fact. I’m like, oh, I can’t believe I forgot to say, thank you. And it does it totally shifts your mood about what your, what you’re doing.
And it actually helped me realize how abundant I am. The fact that I’m able to do these things. I’m able to, you know, buy something. I’m able to go to a grocery store and have like a pick, it made me more aware of all of the amazing things that I am able to do and have.
Ken: Whenever I pay taxes, I feel so appreciative because, you know, I have, I’m giving a great opportunity to serve people. So as a result, I get paid so well, not by one company or one, one person, but, I, I, I feel like there’s, almost like a flood of love coming toward me. And, the half of what I, receive, I share with a government people so they can enjoy there and they can serve other people.
I’m not complaining about taxes because I have so much left after paying all the taxes. That means I can help other people as well. You know, I make more way more, than, bringing food on the table for a family of three. So, I can support, hundreds of, family, other families as well.
And so, I’m so happy that, so many people send me money, happy money, but with that money, I can help many people.
So, I’m almost like a manager about trust fund. And then, then the money has to go to a certain place. So, I’m asking money. Where he wants to go some of our money wants to go to a shelter house, that supports single mother, with kids who run away from abusive husbands. And I’m asking money, where do you want to go?
And then I hear voices like that. And then, so we just send them off, help people, support them, you know, just be with them. Receiving money is fun but also sending money out could be fun. I think I, I probably find more fun when I send money, to those, who are in need because I feel so grateful that I could help them.
So, once you’re in the cycle of appreciation you can receive money. So well, there’s no guilt about, receiving money when you’re in the right place.
Gissele: It also got me to think that it also keeps the flow, right? If money wants to serve, like if the money is to flow, bringing it in and then letting it out, right.
It really is about the flow and that really, keeps it in circulation, cause you say, money is currency, you know current…
Ken: Yes. And I’m not against saving or I’m not against having enough because if you have enough, you feel secure, you know, probably it’s up to you. Some people feel secure with only a thousand dollars.
Some people cannot feel secure with $1 million So you have to draw a line. How much is enough? So, like 10,000, if you have $10,000 in your bank account, you okay. Or five thousand dollars, you okay. You stop worrying about your future. That’s more of your psychological problem.
It’s not a financial problem. So don’t try to save too much money. And so, the book I rec I recommend these days is die with zero. That means, you know, when you die, die with zero, try that it would be hard. It’s harder, to do these days because you know, people, keep saving, saving, saving, saving, until you drop.
So, those people who are high achievers who feel insecure about money, they make too much money. So, try it all, come up with the idea. What if I, I, I was zero, how much money you have to start spending? So, you really have to start spending in your fifties. Otherwise, you can die with zero. So I want to create a culture that, leaving some money when you die is a shame because we haven’t given away enough money.
So, you know, when you’re, if you’re hit sixties and seventies, hurry up and start giving away your money.
Gissele: I don’t think my mum would agree with that,
Ken: tell that to your parents.
Gissele: Yeah, that’s right there. It might be like; you’ve lost your mind.
Yeah, a lot of people live through the cycle of, they go to work you mentioned sometimes people are miserable at work and they just look forward to retiring. And then when they’re retiring, they’re just kind of living off the savings.
I know people that are in retirement right now, and they’re just surviving. They’re, they’re not really thriving. They’re not really sharing. They’re not really like living the most joy even with their money, by sharing it with others and traveling and experiencing. So, there is something to that.
Ken: Sure. Yeah. So, I hope people find joy from giving because giving gives you so much joy. So when you hit the sixties and seventies, not only, you can give money, but also you can share it, your wisdom and all the experiences from life. Younger people need that,
So, I retired for four years in my early thirties, so I don’t have any plan of retiring soon. You know, some people say, can you keep, I, I wrote, I’m going to write 17 books this year. Oh my God. And, the people ask, why do you write so much? Because it kind of kind of pops up. It comes up from a mouse and knows when I, you know, and then my ears when it wake up.
So, like, I feel there’s so much content in me. So, I’m a fountain of, wisdom. So, I’m so happy to share, and. I cannot stop because it just overflows. If I don’t teach, I’m going to die, you know, I’m all swollen up and I’ll, be found, dead with all the characters, you know, would be dripping like blood.
Gissele: Yeah. It’d be wonderful to get those, books translated because I think there’s also a large audience that could really learn from your wisdom, cause I know you publish a lot in Japanese.
So, I’m going to find a team of translators and probably I was stuck with e-book, you know, English publication is so slow. Like this one, for example, I probably published in June. They just won me over here. Yeah, this Joan and this one, just this last, last week and the, this one also published in July.
This is in, seven 11 all over the country. So, you know, what I ride, the book will be out in like three weeks for English books. When I write it’s gonna come out in 18 months, like, what!
Gissele: Yeah. It’s like, a whole process.
So instead of going over my, I might go over, you know, traditional channel, but I don’t mind doing with eBook and I can give it, you know, give it a very affordable price so anybody can read, you know, I think I should charge a little bit, so people getting serious about my content, but I don’t have to charge like 30 or 50, $50 for that.
So, I love the number eight, eight, so like, because it’s an infinity number, so I’m going to price all my books, $8 and 88 cents. So, I’m, I’m the number of eight guy that would symbolizes, abundance. So, I think I’m going to start sharing, all the books, at the, at the price. So, people can, you know, smile on their face, like 8 88.
What does it mean? So that’s a good one.
Gissele: Yeah, for sure. Definitely look forward to.
Ken: Yeah, thank you.
Gissele: So, before you were talking about generosity, you’re a very generous person, very giving person and you know, I’ve heard the saying, you can never go broke by, being generous.
But I think there is a lot of fear when it comes to people, how can people practice the art of generosity instill feel secure in terms of like that they’re not kind of giving away everything and putting themselves at risk.
Ken: I think it’s just a matter of priorities. So, if you just, you know, there’s a cup, you know, your abundance cup, so you have to pour into your abundance cup, you know, your family first, and then if it overflows. You can start sharing what you have. So, give yourself first. So, I, I been teaching about, financial literacy and financial independence.
So, my, near a goal, I’m just telling it to everybody is you become financially independent, so you don’t have to worry about taking care of your family. So, my family will be taken care of even if I die, for the rest of their life. So that means I’m sort of off the hook. I don’t have to worry about them.
So now I can, everything in, it gives me such a great feeling. So, everything I make from now till I die, I can give it for somebody else. So, in other words, I can work for other people, you know, I don’t need expensive, cars, or I have already enough houses. And, I don’t mind wearing the same clothes every day.
So, like, I’m, I’m a very cheap person, you know, I don’t have to be entertained so much because this is the most entertaining, moment. So, if you know that your, your cup is already full and you have more than enough, and then you can be generous. So don’t get, the priorities wrong don’t give out everything.
In other words, don’t take off your shirt and give it to people. You know, because later on. You might regret. Damn. I wish I didn’t, obviously I didn’t give that a because I’m freezing. Right. So, give, give something extra you own, you know, so don’t take off your shirt and give it away.
Gissele: Thank you.
As you were talking, the messaging I received was it’s the vibration of which you give, right? When you’re feeling abundant, you’re feeling overflowing when you give you give from that feeling of overflow, right? Like that’s that the arigato exercise.
So that feeling of like, oh, I gotta pay this. And so on. It just, it makes me feel like, oh yeah, I’m abundant. I can share it. I’m happy to do that.
Ken: Yeah. So, you should not give anything that makes you feel guilty or like even regret about giving. So, give a certain amount that makes brings you joy and to them. Don’t sacrifice yourself because a sacrifice doesn’t serve anybody.
You know, it gives you a guilt, a regret, and, what a bad feeling you have, if you just a regret about giving, you know, What like go to the person, say, sorry, I gave you too much can i get this back.
Gissele: Well, I’ll just take some of this change back.
Ken: Yeah. So, can I have a chance, you know, when you donate something that, that’s funny, right? So, it gives something that you don’t mind giving. So don’t, don’t try to be too nice, unless you achieve financial independence. So, achieve financial independence first.
And the funny thing is, after I achieve financial independence, I make more way more money. It’s almost like, when you don’t have a girlfriend or boyfriend, you’re so hungry for that.
Right? So, you know, people don’t, don’t go to a hundred. Right, say when they, dying to get more clients, people would and go to those places, say just, there are two dentists right in the neighborhood, one dentistry, they don’t have any clients. They just opened up. Do you want to go to them?
Because you’re not really sure he or she is guaranteed. And, but the other dentist, there is always a long have to book into two weeks in advance or three weeks sometimes. Which one would you, would you choose to go like the one with a longer line? Right. So, the funny thing is the, the, the less you need, the more you receive.
So that is abundance, the law of abundance. So, for yourself first, emotionally, first by saying, thank you. And he got taught to your money, but with that attitude, people can feel it, oh, this person doesn’t need from me. And then they trust you. So, this fading always that I have more than enough, is, the show shortcut to abundance.
So, fill yourself, first with appreciation and then the money follows. And then if you filled up with appreciation and, money, you can start giving away crazy. And I hope you do that. So,
So, I hope I’m going to do the same in English. You know, it’s a little tricky because English is a hard language for me, but I’ll, this is fun, you know, I I’m, I’m making a lot of mistakes, but I’m okay.
Gissele: Oh, you’re doing a great job. Like it’s, you’re I wanted to ask, you know, you’ve been doing this for a very long time.
Have you ever found anything surprising in all of that? Anything that really kind of surprised you about people’s either beliefs about money or…
Ken: Yes. Yes. You know, our expression, like you’ve heard, or you’re experienced so many interesting things, so I can write a book.
Right. And I have, I have done it so many times as I’m saying. So, one of the fun thing about becoming the bestselling author is like, when you meet somebody at the party, you hear the most amazing stories. It’s almost like those stories in the movies. So, like, have you ever met somebody who won a lottery twice in his lifetime.
It’s so, so fascinating how it changed his psyche and how it kind of like, changed his life forever in a positive way, a negative way. So, like whenever I just bumped into those people, like I know, like, I feel like, Hmm, very tasting, looking, tasting delicious.
So, I sit down with them for hours and just ask them many questions about, how they’re influenced by. So, I have so many interesting stories about, people, getting shift and also their grandparent’s story. So, one of the stories I wrote in happy money book is that a guy, who lost everything, he inherited his business from his father and grandfather.
His grandfather was a very famous businessperson, but you know, the second generation, they’re kind of less drive. And the third generation, or those who kind of ended up losing everything and his case was the same. So, he was visited in a small apartment. He had to sell his big mansion and inherited from his grandfather.
He moved out and lived in a small, tiny two-room apartment, and he got visited by an old one. So, this old man, saying that he used to work for his grandfather and he heard about, his mentor’s grandson was in a bad situation. So, he just hired a detective and found out where,
So this, old man visited, him and he, he said, he shared about his story. When he was young, he was taken as a, mailman male boy, when he was like eight, eight or nine. So, his grandfather’s, was almost like, a father to this very successful looking man.
And, since his grandfather taught him everything about business, this person went independent and started his own business and became somewhat successful due to his grandfather’s, teachings and love. And he never forgot about his mentor even, even one day. So, he heard that, his mentors, grandson was in a bad situation.
So, he rushed to him and he said so, and he brought a big sukiyaki set. There is, you know, meat and rice and everything, and he needs, he brought a huge sukiyaki set. So, cheer up, you know, I just want to do, show my appreciation for your grandfather for all the things he did for me and, and his, family little kids.
So, he would, there were so happy, just like, it’s been a while since they had the, you know, delicious sukiyaki. So, at the end of dinner, his child found out there’s an envelope at the bottom of the box and, inside was a check, that that was worth enough to buy a big house. And his, on the end on the back of the check says, thank you.
And then I was really touched by the story because all the love and care that your grandfather gave somebody like 60 years ago, come back and then support you. So all that love you give to, somebody now. Will be handed over and then it gives a big and beautiful,
And, and then he, or she wants to do something and payback, that, that what they receive 60 years. Isn’t that beautiful,
Gissele: Mmhmm, Such a beautiful story.
Ken: Yeah. So, whenever I hear a story like that I feel so warm and so happy and I just, I can write a book on this beautiful relationship. I can imagine this little boy who’s lost and know what to do was taken, into, his grandfather’s, you know, wings and just very well taken care of, and then this guy becomes another business tycoon, and then, you know, it gives back,
Oh, by the way, he became successful afterwards, because he realized that, you know,
Gissele: Ah such a great story.
Ken: Yeah. So I have a lot of stories like that. So that’s why my books are like more than 100 books.
Gissele: You raised something that you had in your book, which maybe we could talk about is the support people around you.
Right? How many people can you count would be there for you if something went awry as a way to kind of not worry about money. Right. And you said that, you know, you could count 50 people. I gotta be honest. It gave me a little bit of anxiety cause I thought to myself, oh my gosh, what I want to put that stress on someone.
I think I kind of struggled with that piece and you, you know, you mentioned that it’s very different in, in Japan versus in north America, how we tend to be more isolationist. What do you think would help shift that? Because for me, I have this mentality that I would like, I wouldn’t want to be a burden and you know, I have to bring my family to someone else.
I get the point of the exercise. It was really to see how many people care about you. And absolutely, I have lots of people in my life that would absolutely hands down would actually do stuff for us and take us in that would do it. It was more my anxiety of like, oh my gosh, I wouldn’t ever want to do it to someone.
Ken: Right? Yeah. So Gissele I think you’re a generous person. If you find out your best friend is, in a bad place financially, you want to help, right? Yeah. So, wouldn’t you be hurt? if he or she didn’t tell you that they had a hard time You’ll be upset, and you be probably upset and just tell them you probably yell at them.
Why didn’t you tell me? Right. Okay. Yeah, if you’re a good friend. So, you would be more upset if he or she didn’t ask you for help. So, so just, change the places. What would your best friend feel if you didn’t come, to him or her for help? You know, they, they would be upset. So that’s why I’m repeating myself.
We have a PhD in giving, but we are so lousy at receiving. So, this is the idea. You’re you just go miles, you know, to, to save your friends. But when you’re just, having a hard time, like you kind of like lick your own words in the, in the cave.
Ken: You have to be willing to, you have to open yourself, and ask for help because that’s what all the adversities are for.
It gives you opportunities for you to be humble and ask for help you need, when you need help, you have to ask for one and it’s a great learning experience. If life is to to learn about love. Giving love is one thing and also receiving love is another. And, and, and the abundance and love has a cycle by giving and receiving.
You know if you, think of this way, you’re giving an opportunity. You’re giving your friends an opportunity to show his or her love towards you. That means, by receiving love, the love cycle completes. So just, you know, and when you feel like you, you could help somebody. Your best friend especially don’t to feel like, yes.
You know, I’m so happy I have enough extra money, so I could help my best friend that gives you probably the highest joy, right? Yeah. Yeah. So, give them the joy, but to do that, you have to feel funny. I go, I don’t want to be a burden on you, but I, would it be even possible? The, if I ask you for help, like here, it’s just like, kidding me.
You know, why didn’t you come here two months earlier? Yeah. So, you know, I’m just challenging you, you know, you, you have to start from somewhere, just take a risk and ask for help because by, by doing that, you can complete the cycle of this love receiving/giving. And in hard times like this, you have to start asking for help.
And for those of you who feel like you have more than enough, you have to start sharing what you have. And by doing that, your abundance completes, the money, extra money having a bank account, it’s not yours, it’s somebody else’s. And so don’t keep it under your name. it’s for somebody else’s. So, ask your money, where the money wants to go and let it go because, some other money will come back to you.
So the trust is so important. So, by letting go of your money, you can learn about trust. I think it’s a good deal. You’re buying the lesson of trust with money.
Gissele: Thank you for sharing that. I love that. And in your the vision of having really abundant people share the abundance people that are sort of in the middle class, you know, living their dream, like taking risks and that people that are currently facing poverty.
Cause I mean, some of the people that are our listeners work with people that are very poor or, you know, like losing their house and so on so that they can feel like that they can have the opportunity to a attract. What could you, what could we say to somebody who was working with somebody who was poor and wanted more, a flow of abundance?
Ken: Yeah. So the, the baby step is you have to come up with something. You have to find something in you that could be traded for a higher price. For example, if you’re working in a labor labor position, you know, you’re exchanging your labor with the money, but you must be good at something. You know, you must be good at talking with people.
You must be good at, with something with your hands. You know, or cooking or something,
So you probably get paid little bit more, maybe a dollar or two per hour. And by, job, a hopping for a few times, you find a better place. And do you find more energy and exchanging, sweat for money? And after about a couple of years, maybe a few, you, you begin to find that you are more.
Entitled to work in a better environment. So go back to school or get online education. It doesn’t cost so much, sometimes most oftentimes it’s free and get fascinated with who you are falling in love with yourself. And if you can come up with certain gifts like selling, you probably, be out of the, dark place in a matter of months.
And if you’re a good, good at listening, you can be a great coach. And if you are good at cooking, just go get a job at a higher, higher paying place. So, do something that will serve you and other people by doing that, you get paid. So if you keep changing, positions,
And then you can be probably out of poverty line by then. And, probably the, the choice is wider. So you can, do, you can get paid, higher and then probably, you have a better choice and, the rest is the lesson you’re going to create. So getting out from the, shithole is the hardest part, but after that, I think you’ll be fine.
So just trust, that, you can make it so that getting depressed about where you are is the, the, the, probably the biggest obstacle you have.
Gissele: Would you say Ken, that belief is the first part. If you’re focusing on being depressed in this situation that you are, you’re less likely to believe that you can make it.
Ken: Yeah, I know. I know. It’s hard to believe. So, so I’m sure that you have the same, you know, symptom because I have a hard time believing in myself so that that’s when, good friends and good mentors come. Yeah. You know, good friends and good mentors believe in you more than you believe in yourself. So when I was having a hard time in my twenties, my mentors and my friends believed in my better future.
So having a great friend who trust you more than you do yourself is super good. So if you hang around with a bad friends, you have to get out from that too. You don’t have to trust. You don’t have to believe in yourself, but just, change the place where you look, you know, you’re looking down.
That’s why you see only the bad things, but if you kind of look up, you can see a beautiful, more beautiful future. So you don’t have to believe in it, but just looking at it. And if you start looking a different direction, the whole, concept of life will shift as well. So by looking at, by focusing on what’s ahead of you, and if you’ve, if you feel even the slightest excitement, maybe I can just have a better life.
Maybe I can discover gifts, that feeling or lift. Yeah. So, you have to start from somewhere. So don’t think that you believe is important because you cannot do that. I know that I’m talking about from experiences. I have no way, trust that in the future that, you know, I’d be a bestselling author when I was having a hard time, like, because I never wrote anything, you know, I, I probably thought don’t be kidding with me because I never wrote anything.
How could I become a bestselling author? I don’t even keep journals. I know my, some of my friends are keeping diaries since they’re like six, like what, you know, I don’t have that. so I don’t have that discipline. I don’t have that capability, but I became an author. So you don’t have to believe in that, but just look toward the direction that, you could be a little excited about.
So that is a first step.
Gissele: Thank you very much. That’s great. Following your excitement is definitely important so you have a community called the arigato community, which I am blessed to be apart of. can you talk a little bit about the community and maybe some other things you might be working on that you want to share with the audience?
Ken: Yes, thank you for asking. So I have, the second largest online community in Japan. I have about 12,000, members, and online. So every month and, everywhere, somewhere, people meet, they gathered under the name of Ken Honda, but actually I’m not needed, like, because they’re just having great time without me.
So, subcommittees and a lot of a groups, all over Japan. And I wondered, just a year ago would not be fun if I had the similar community like that in English speaking world, since my book is out in 40 different countries and 15 different languages, it’d be really fun if I could have a community in English.
So I I’m going to start, online community on August. Yeah. So right now it’s a baby, mode, but it’s going to be open to a public, fairly soon. So Google arigato living or Ken Honda, you’ll find all the information we meet once a month.
And we share a lot about, how arigato, or being appreciative about life and happy money,
It’d be super fun, being, I’ve been looking forward to. The day and sometime next year that I bumped into a group in London, Frankfurt, and then Delhi, or, you know, Singapore. So, I’m so excited that I did beginning to form this, group. So with this mastermind group, just, people can share what they feel about money and we can share, what happened in your past.
And it it’s such a healing experience when we find out that, people from different backgrounds on the other side of the planet experienced the similar things like 30, 40 years ago. And we have the same kind of scars and wounds and together we can heal. I believe in the power of multicultural, friends.
So, I want to start, something that human being has, has never even seen before, friendship,
So, we, we can probably finish, two books a year, at least. And then when the team starts to function, we can publish it every month. So, please wait another few months. And then my books will be out.
Gissele: Awesome! I look forward to reading the one about the children too, because I think that I would definitely see.
Thank you so, so much, Ken, I’m super, super grateful that you’re on the show and thank you so much for answering my questions.
Ken: Thank you Gissele
Gissele: Please check out Ken’s website, Ken honda.com and join his arigato community, to be with like-minded people, focused on abundance join us again for another episode of the loving compassion podcast with Gissele
Ken: Thank you so much for inviting me. I really enjoy, our conversation and people have a great life and I’m praying for you every day and every night. Thank you. Arigato. Bye-bye.