Ep. 51- Alexis Donkin: Alchemizing our Challenges with Compassion

Listen to Alexi's story of overcoming lung COVID during a time when little was known about the virus. Listen to how she was able to alchemize this difficult moment into something greater with gratitude and compassion. We also talk about psychic powers, listening to our bodies, self-care, and the power of compassion.


Gissele: Hello and welcome everyone to the Love and Compassion podcast with Giselle.

Today we have an amazing guest, Alexis Donkin, who is called the Destructix, I’m probably pronouncing that wrong. She offers thoughtful mentorship and psychic insight at crossroads moments for the secretly spiritual women, super accomplished in many things from publishing and music to art and language and steeped in verbal tea.

Alexis is the witchy bestie you’ve always wanted. Please join me in welcoming Alexis.

Alexis: Hi, Alexis. Hello, thank you for having me. Oh,

Gissele: no, thank you for being on the show. Before we begin, can you tell me a little bit about what the Destructix means?

Alexis: Yeah, so I was looking for a title that would really sit with me, that really kind of [00:01:00] embodied what I do for my clients and my approach to things, and a lot of people use the word creatrix, and I just didn’t, that’s just not me, you know, that implies It’s It’s only creative energy and, and I’m not that I destroy

Gissele: things.

Alexis: And, and part of that is just, you know, the destructrix is a, it’s a female destroyer. And that energy is really about. Letting go, destroying the things that no longer serve, removing that in order to transform and be reborn and, embrace for creation.

Gissele: Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for sharing this. And also thank you for explaining.

Alexis: I know. It’s a little weird.

Gissele: Interesting. In my life, I’ve met people who had like that energy where they came sort of [00:02:00] into your life and it was a little bit of a tornado where things kind of got shooken up and then they kind of left. And then you’re like, what happened? But yeah, it’s, it’s that it’s, it’s a really interesting energy and it’s such a helpful energy in the sense of sometimes maybe that’s what we need because we so.

Yeah. Not eager to let go of things. Right. And so, can I, can I ask how you got started into this sort of line of work, if

Alexis: you may? Well, I was actually, I was born psychic, and I’m the daughter of 2 ordained ministers. So that was tricky for me to kind of embrace who I was. And I didn’t have a lot of.

Resources and support to allow me to explore those things the way that I’m Might have benefited from at a younger age. I kind of had to figure it [00:03:00] out on my own. And because I’m a zenial there really wasn’t online communities and things to, to draw on at that time. It was really the wild West in a lot of ways.

And in some ways it still is, so I had to kind of figure it out for myself over time. And it wasn’t until I was, in my mid thirties that I really, I was working on, I was writing an interfaith. devotional and world religions curriculum. And it caused me to be in this meditative state for days on end.

And I had this powerful vision that was like, you can’t ignore this anymore. You have to do this. Like this is part of who you are and this is how you have to be in the world. And so after that, it was really just a series of, okay, [00:04:00] how do I figure these things out? What? Excuse me, what am I called to do with them?

How do I want to work with them? You know, figuring out how do I create spiritual boundaries for myself and then. As I started doing some of my intuitive coaching, I realized that a lot of my clients were people who were going through some of those things that I had been through. They didn’t have the support that they needed.

They didn’t have the people in their lives that they felt safe discussing these things with. And so. I was able to kind of shepherd them and guide them through that process.

Gissele: Yeah. Thank you for sharing that. It must have been difficult or challenging. I don’t want to use the word difficult but challenging to navigate that as a child, like within the world of the realm of religion.

 I know when I was younger. Spirituality was seen in a specific way. Like my, I [00:05:00] had my, I had family members that kind of practice sort of like what people would consider aberrant arts, right? Like somebody that I knew used to have like a little skull in a, in, in a little box that they used to talk to and had all these practices.

And so that was really kind of the only side of it that we saw. It was either kind of. evidence-based and research or, you know, like very mind focused or this sort of occult, they’re sort of not in the middle. And so navigating that and trying to find your people must have been a little bit

Alexis: challenging or difficult.

Definitely. I mean, I, I think if you’re connected with spirit, you will receive the guidance that you need when you need it. In the way that you need it. Yeah. But that doesn’t take the challenging aspect out of it. Yes. Yes.

Gissele: Yeah. [00:06:00] And so, and was it, was it easy for you to listen to that guidance? Was it easy?

Because I’ve been in situations as well that the guidance I received didn’t make sense in my mind. And so I’m like, really? That’s what we’re doing? Why are we doing that? And so, how easy or difficult was it for you to follow that guidance?

Alexis: Well, at first, you really have to figure out what the guidance is even telling you.

And especially when you’re young, that’s really difficult because you’re feeling things for the 1st time. And so you don’t understand what the sensations in your body are telling you. And so kind of connecting the intuitive. Information to the physical information is it’s it’s next to impossible. You make huge mistakes, which you would expect of, like, any average 12 year old.

As you get more in touch with your body, though and this is something that I talk about with my clients all the time is it’s really important to [00:07:00] remember that the body is. Very essential to the spiritual journey and to life, you really need to connect to your physical being. And so the more in touch you are with the physical sensations that are happening in your body and connecting that with the information that you’re getting the clearer and easier it’s going to be to trust your intuitive, not just to trust any kind of spiritual guidance that you get.

So, yeah, that. I made a lot of mistakes when I was younger. But thankfully now even when I get those really off the wall, intuitive nudges that don’t seem to connect to anything, I’m like, you know what? I’m just going to follow it. And then when I do, it’s really fantastic. So,

Gissele: yeah, thank you for sharing that.

Can you tell the audience a little bit [00:08:00] about how the body, like the role the body plays in spirituality? Because obviously the body plays an important role in health, right? In us staying alive, but people might not always understand how it fits with spirituality. Because I think sometimes people have been taught to bypass.

Like, let’s bypass the body, let’s bypass those feelings, like, bypass, we just, like, we want to get above this material 3D world. How do the two

Alexis: interplay? Well, I would say that everything that’s physical has a spiritual signature and everything that’s spiritual has a physical signature. You know, our physical bodies are a reflection of our spirit.

And that’s clear, right? You know, form follows function. When you use something a certain way, it develops and is shaped a certain way. And the same is true with the body. You know, if a swimmer’s body changes when they practice swimming you know, a cellist’s body changes when they practice cello. [00:09:00] It’s the same thing.

And so, as we go through life, and you can see this when you look at someone who’s in their 80th or 90th year, you see how their body has been shaped over time and how it’s been used over time. But. There’s actually been studies that show that the body sends more messages to the brain than the brain sends to the body.

So how we interact with the world, you know, the body is, is, is this 1st, line of defense and this 1st, line of inquiry in this 1st, line of experience and how our body looks. You know, how, how people perceive us also shapes our physical experience. And all of these things shape our spiritual experience. You know, what makes sense to you, what feels good to you is going to be different depending on how your body is shaped.

Like, for example. I have hypermobile [00:10:00] Ehlers Danlos. Okay, this is a connective tissue issue, right? So I can’t do yoga. Yoga actually will cause me to have injury. So I’m not going to be practicing different asanas as part of my spiritual practice, but for somebody who doesn’t have these connective tissue issues.

Yoga could be a really wonderful and powerful ally and practice for them to experience all kinds of spiritual, things. So it really just depends on, you know, how your body is and, and the more in touch you are with it, the more marvelous it can be. I mean, how wonderful is it to experience? On your skin, you know, how wonderful is it to experience the smell of fresh bread baking?

These can be spiritual experiences and these can really ground us in the present moment. And you can’t have that if [00:11:00] you don’t have a body. So, so enjoy what the body offers. Yeah. And

Gissele: I think that’s what more and more that I’m really becoming aware of just, well, joyful and precious and beautiful. Every single day, each experience can be like, we’re so future focus, or sometimes we’re so past focus.

That, you know, we think, you know, once I do this, I’m going to be happy once I do this and we’re constantly trying to reach a goal that seems always to be moving, but there’s joy in the moment. There’s joy in experience and a cup of coffee and just watching kids play and, and all of those moments. You’re right.

We can’t do without a body. We can’t do without. So instead of making sometimes the body our enemy, can we make it our, our friend or our best friend and it’s helping us really experience and get the most juice out of life, [00:12:00] if you may.

Alexis: Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I would say that that’s one of the, I mean, why else are we here?

If we aren’t here to experience this physical life, there, whatever you believe about what happens after you’re after or before the body is unique, you know. Spirit is one thing, but the body is unique, and the body is special, and this experience right now is special. And so, it’s worth taking the time to embrace what is about that.

And, and that’s, and I would say, and this might be a little unconventional, but I would say even in the difficult things, you know, to find a kind of joy and beauty in, in even those difficult things. As part of this physical experience.

Gissele: Yeah. And you’ve had some challenges, obviously, I think before we had talked about [00:13:00] your experiences with COVID.

So 2020, do you want to share a little bit about that? And what sort of helped you through?

Alexis: Yeah, so I, I was, I got lung COVID in March of 2020, which was like the first wave of the pandemic. And so nobody knew what was going on. There weren’t tests for it. There was a lot of confusion. I ended up being isolated from my family for 11 weeks because they just didn’t know what to do.

And at the time I was still breastfeeding my youngest child. And so they would bring her to me. Just to, like, nurse and then she would have to be kept out and so, you know, it was, it was a really painful, awful thing for all of us because, you know, my husband was like, is my wife going to, like, is she going to be okay?

Is she going to, like, is she going to live? Is she going to be [00:14:00] normal ever? And then my kids were traumatized. Like, so both of them ended up having to be in therapy because it was like, you know, What’s going on with mom? You know, this person that’s supposed to be this rock for you is just not there and we can see her but We can’t interact with her.

And then even after my isolation, excuse me, it took a long time for me to get back to where I am now, which is like, I mean, it was, it was a hard road and just like with acute COVID, there were cycles of symptoms. And so I would have, like, I would have extreme fatigue, or then I would have like chronic migraines, or then I would have, you know, vision problems or neurological problems or GI [00:15:00] problems.

And it would just like, it was just like, what do I do? Which specialist will I go to now who won’t be able to help me? Yeah, it must have been scary. Yeah, it

Gissele: must have been really, really scary. What do you think helped you through the process in being able to get through that piece? Like what, what, what were some of the pillars that really helped you get through that time?

Cause like you said, there was no answers at that time. Nobody knew anything. I mean, everything was changing moment by moment. What helped you kind of hold on and helped you get through the other side?

Alexis: I’ve always been this kind of person. I’ve always been an active person and I have always told myself, well, this is temporary.

So, and then I wrote everything is temporary. Everything is temporary. [00:16:00] So I could trust that everything was going to be temporary. I could always find something that some thing that I could do or focus on. So, especially during that isolation, this was the hardest time. What I would do is I would practice grounding where I would like, think of, like, I would look around.

Even in my room or out the window, and I’d be like, what’s something that I can appreciate about right now? What’s 1 thing? And I would look out and I’d be like, oh, the sky is blue. It’s beautiful today. Or I would listen to the birds and I would think about the birds or I would, you know, enjoy my blanket and the sensation of my blankets.

There were such small things because that’s all I could do. You know, and then yeah. I was having cognitive issues as well, and so I was like, okay, what’s something that I can [00:17:00] do that can keep my brain where I want it to be, you know, and so I started, I got Duolingo on my phone and I was, and I was like, what’s the hardest language that I can think of to like, practice?

I was like, Korean, we’ll do that. And so I was like, even if I just did like one lesson a day, I was just like, okay, I’m just going to do one little thing. And, and then I also focused on, you know, what really mattered to me. I noticed that when I was the sickest, my values, like what was most important to me, my priorities shifted.

And because I, I really didn’t know what was going to happen to me. And I was like, if I, you know, if I die, how do I feel about how I’ve lived my life? And as far as like a bucket list, I was like, I’ve done everything that I really wanted to do as, you know, like the experiences that [00:18:00] I’ve had. I feel good about.

I don’t really have any regrets. The only thing. That was really important to me was time with my family with people that I was really close to. And so when I did have time with them, I was really deeply present with that. And I just made a really big effort to. Just enjoy being with them and telling them the things that they needed that I wanted them to hear from me and to this day that has changed.

I whenever I have a moment where either of my kids. I’ll just give them a hug and I’ll whisper in their ear and I’ll say, you know, I love you. I’m proud of you. You bring me joy every day. And, and I’m really mean it like I put a lot of meaning behind those words and I let them just sit with them because [00:19:00] you don’t know what’s going to happen.

I mean, even a healthy person could walk outside and get struck by a car and be gone. And so, making the time to do those things. It’s really, it’s really important.

Gissele: Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for sharing your stories with so many powerful things. Do you think that this experience helped you get to a point you might not have gotten if you hadn’t gotten?

Alexis: Absolutely. So sick. Yeah, I would, I had to rebuild my entire life. That’s why you’re the destructix now. I mean, I, I really, I really did. I, I ended up rebuilding my health. Obviously my approach to my body is completely different. I’m much more in [00:20:00] tune with my body and I know. Exactly what it needs, what it needs because I’ve had to pay such close attention for so long.

I also, I rebuilt my marriage because I ended up during this time, I ended up being on the brink of divorce because it was just so wearing and there was so much happening. So the way that I communicate with my husband and the way that we treat each other, the kinds of things we do together.

Totally changed. I had to rebuild my parenting because my children were traumatized and had these horrible experiences. So I ended up having to, advocate for them in really big ways to find them the supports that they needed. And honestly, the way that we are as a family is just so much better. I, you know, we don’t have the kinds of.[00:21:00]

Issues that even some typical families might have because we have structures in place. My kids have coping mechanisms. They’re able to regulate themselves. They help each other regulate. I mean, it’s just, it’s a really beautiful thing. And. In some, it’s, it seems backwards, but in many ways, I’m actually grateful for the experience of this.

I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Yeah, absolutely not. Yeah, however, because it happened to me, you know, I was able to take it and use it to transform. All these different parts of my life and I’m grateful for where I am now.

Gissele: And so well said because I think one of the things that we must acknowledge what is your willingness to optimize a situation that was so, [00:22:00] so difficult.

And, you know, like sort of mine for gold from it, right? The fact that you were even willing to do the little things such as, okay, what am I grateful for? I’m breathing. There’s the sky. You know, the soft pillow. Being willing to do that work of Because it’s so much easier sometimes to just really swallowing the pit of despair of our victimization, but to be able to look at things to be grateful for in even the most challenging of circumstances, I think it’s.

It’s something to acknowledge. So I think that from that perspective, I think your being able to shift your mindset really helped you get to the point where you can say, I’m grateful for that experience. Like I said, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone else, but I’m

Alexis: grateful. And I would, I do want to, I want to not be disingenuous in some way, because I want to be [00:23:00] clear.

I did have times that were really low, you know, like, there were times where I wasn’t able to do that as well. Or I was having, 1 of the symptoms that I’ve had with my migraines was actually mood, altering stuff and it was difficult and and. So there were times that where the only thing I could do was tell someone I’m having this moment and I’m not, I’m not able to like walk through it.

Well, like I need your support. And, and that was all that I, you know, that was the only thing that I could do. And fortunately because of who I am, I had those supports and I did feel comfortable reaching out to people. But, you know, I do like. If someone is listening to this or watching this I [00:24:00] do want you to know that, like, it’s normal to have those really low moments and just to, you know, to be okay with that.

That’s a normal part of the experience. Yeah, absolutely. And just, you know, reach out to people when you don’t feel like you can do it on your own, because there are people who will support you.

Gissele: And I just want to stress cause I think what you’re saying is so spot on and it really goes to my questions on compassion, which is like be compassionate to yourself.

I know in my spiritual journey, I’ve had instances like of like when you feel bliss and you feel grateful and you feel, and then there’s other times when you just can’t find it. You can’t find the compassion. You can’t find the love for yourself. You really can’t find it in like you, you just got to admit, okay, I can’t find it today.

I just really can’t. Maybe tomorrow, maybe in the next moment, but right now I don’t have it. That’s okay. [00:25:00] I’ll has compassion or self compassion in particular really helped you when navigating kind of your most difficult moments. I

Alexis: mean, I would definitely say that there would be times where it’s like, I can’t do what I used to do before.

Like that’s not possible right now. And. I would sit with that, you know, I’d sit with the, the frustration, the, the despair and the discouragement and I’d be like, okay, that’s okay that I had that feeling and, and it’s understandable and now, like, what can I do? What do I need to do for myself? How do I need to be for myself now, who I am now?

And one of the most powerful practices that I learned over this time that I think most of us in the [00:26:00] modern world could could use this lesson is to rest and to take breaks and to pace yourself. You know, you don’t always have to be productive and your value is not from being productive. You don’t have to achieve something to be worthy to be here.

Just being is enough and at, especially at the beginning of my illness, it was really hard for me because I do things, you know, I am, I am a recovering overachiever. So, like, sitting still and not being able to do things was like. What is happening right now? How can I, like, how can I contribute to the world?

What am I, you know, but over time I realized, you know, everything in nature has cycles [00:27:00] and we are creatures of nature and we have cycles too. And one of those is dormancy. One of those is rest and it’s good and safe to rest.

Gissele: Yeah, you said so much there. I think, you know, we have such a culture of hustle and grind and, you know, like, that’s one of my things for 2024.

Let’s be done with that already. Like, let’s be, because I think if we’re gonna work hard, we gotta rest just as hard. And we just kind of, we, like, especially for me and in my culture and in my family, we always had this, this perspective of push through, push through, just push through, push, push through. But then you get to the point where you just can’t push through anymore, right?

Like you, all the stuff you’ve been pushing through, it just comes up at you. And it’s sort of like really focusing on being not the doing, but just the [00:28:00] being. Yeah. But we, we have a hard time identifying with just being right. Like think about how we introduce ourselves, you know, I’m a so and so and I do this and I do that and I do the other.

It’s not about, I’m just a human being, trying my best, I’m working on myself, but the resting component is so, so important and I find that if you don’t rest, your body will find ways to find rest for you. But yeah, I can’t believe how much our identity is related to, or connected to, how much we do.

One of the hardest, most challenging things I had to say to myself was really, Can I still love and accept myself even if I accomplish nothing in this world? Like, even if I don’t accomplish all the things, quote unquote, that I think I’m supposed to do? And I still just accept myself and just [00:29:00] be, why do you think that being has for so long been regarded as something that is just not the way, but, and is it changing from your perspective?

Alexis: Well, I think that it, it stems from internalized capitalism. You know, we’re told, I mean, basically, since the industrial revolution, people have just been work, you know, we’re just working, working, working, and there’s no seasons to it. You know, we removed, once we got out of agriculture, we removed the seasons.

If you go to a farming community, people take breaks because you have to. You know, that’s just how the natural world works. But if you’re in a city or you’re in, you know, some kind of industry that is technological, There are no breaks. There’s no [00:30:00] reason to have a break because a machine just goes. But I think, especially with, current generations, there’s a recognition that this is not, we’re not machines.

We can’t function that way. And we should not function that way. We deserve to have breaks. We deserve to have You know, our work and at the end of the workday. We deserve to have time with our friends. You know, we deserve to have a life. That’s not work. And I, I mean, you can see it kind of with the, the ways in which, unions have gotten more popular.

And more powerful again, which is wonderful. It’s wonderful. I think it’s wonderful that people are recognizing that we don’t have to produce that we can just be and that it’s [00:31:00] enough, you know, so much of so many mental health issues stem from this problem. This idea that you, you’re not worthy if you’re not producing, and you have to be, you know, going going going.

And if we could just. Kind of deal with this idea of internalized capitalism and let go of these ideas of like, produce, produce, produce, achieve, achieve, achieve, and rest. I think it would just be so much better, not only for us as human beings, but for our planet in so many

Gissele: ways. Agreed. Agreed. I love what you said about the seasons because I think, you know, so much of our life we’ve moved so far away from flow and from connecting to nature and from our own inner nature, that it’s, you know, it’s, it’s artificial, right?

It’s this, this, that we can go 24 7 and that we’re machines and we’re not in that. [00:32:00] Beingness. And so what do you think really helps you when you are in those moments where you get caught in the whole, you know, rat race and the whole I should be doing this and should be doing that. What helps you come back to yourself.

Alexis: I usually notice. So I do make lists for myself. Okay. I’m a list person. I like to have structure that helps me focus and helps me, you know, make sure I get things done that I do need to get done or want to get done. But I noticed sometimes, I’ll want to do more. And then I’ll be like, no, that’s my, that’s my trick is if I want to do more, I got the things done already.

I want to do more. I’ll be like, no, I’m going to stop now. And that keeps me from getting burnt out because it allows me to pace, you [00:33:00] know, spread out my energy and then I can do some fun things as opposed to just doing the work stuff. And obviously there are times where you have to. You have to do a little bit more because of obligations or whatever.

But for the most part, if I have the space to do that, I do work really hard at cultivating that space. I, I will take it, you know. I also pay attention to my body a lot. I mean, I really, I really try and, and pay attention like, okay, how does my body feel right now? You know, how do my joints feel? Have I been sitting too long?

You know, how do my eyes feel? Am I tired? Do I need to, you know, drink some water? Whatever the case may be, and then I’m just like, you know, I’m just gonna, even if I didn’t get everything done on my list, I’ll be like, Nope, my body says no.


Gissele: We don’t often listen to our bodies right [00:34:00] again it’s that push through culture that I could just do this and then the body finds a way so I think it’s beautiful that you are listening to your body as. You know, as a way to kind of stay connected to yourself. What are the other things that you do in order to honor your body for yourself?

Alexis: I have rituals of self care. I have like, and I say rituals. I mean, like, I don’t, I’m not like, you know, I’m not doing sage or something necessarily, but but like, I have like, there’s nothing wrong with that, but that’s just not me. You know, that’s not what I do. So, like, I have like a skin care routine, you know, in the morning and evening.

I give myself a facial massage when I put my lotions into my skin. I try and take a bath at least once a week, and I will either take I will scrub my skin, [00:35:00] or I will like soak in Epsom salts or something like that, and, you know, do a face mask, deep condition my hair, I mean, like the whole thing and it really is like a ritual and I, and then, you know, I’ll, my hair care routine, my face.

Skincare. I mean, it’s, it’s involved and I, I recognize that it’s involved. It’s not for everybody, but it’s definitely it’s a grounding practice and it’s, and it’s a ritualizing, practice that communicates very deeply that my body’s important, that, that my body is important than that, how I feel in my body is important.

I’ve worked really hard at. Wearing clothing that feels good to me, you know, that that makes me feel sexy. That makes me feel [00:36:00] pretty. That makes me feel comfortable and good in my body. You know, I, I think about what foods I eat, and I don’t mean this in like a, not in like a diet aesthetic way, but in a, like, how does this make my body feel when I eat it?

Does this feel good to me? Or does it feel, I mean, yes, like sometimes I want to have cake and I’m going to love some of those cookies. They feel good. Yeah. And also like. If I had cake all day, I would make myself feel sick. So, like, I have, like, you know, if I’m gonna have something like that, I have it once a day because that’s what, like, that’s what feels good to me, you know, and then, like, I’m like, okay, I wake up in the morning and I don’t just automatically have a certain breakfast.

I think about it. You know, I stop and I think and I’m like, what would feel good to me this morning to [00:37:00] eat? And then, you know, like I have like a kind of things to choose from and then like, I’m like, okay, this is the thing I want to have for breakfast this morning. You know, it’s, it’s those little things and I’ve just made it a habit.

To really honor my physical form and you know, like I, I dance for exercise. I love dancing and I do it because it’s fun for me. It feels good to my body. It feels like a celebration of life and it’s enjoyable when I get the movements, you know, better. Yeah. And so, yeah, there’s, there’s. But, like, there’s a couple of keys there, you know?

The key is, like, it needs to feel good, for me. And it needs to work with, like, my overall Life. And so, you know, this stuff that I do isn’t necessarily going to work for everyone and that’s [00:38:00] okay. You know, you don’t, it shouldn’t. They’re not me. Yeah,

Gissele: yeah, definitely. Well, it could definitely relate to some of the stuff you were saying.

I love skincare. I love, I love the process. I love especially since I discovered for me Korean skincare, like that’s one of my, it’s so much fun. I know, I love it. And like K beauty and there’s so many amazing things on Tik Tok that you, I’m learning about like my skin and how to, and it’s just so fun.

Like I think about it just, it’s just fun. It’s just, you know, like I can love and accept myself as I am and choose to change. Like it doesn’t have to be or right. And so I have fun with it. And so but one of the things you said to me just now really made me think, you know what? It’s, You know, it’s funny how you apply things in one part of the life, but not another.

I’m such a creature of habit when it comes to breakfast. Like I’m just like, I’m just going to have my own meal. And then I thought, [00:39:00] Oh, you know what, what would it, what would it be like every day? Just decide what do I, what does my body feel like today? What does it feel like? I do that in other areas of my life, including what I’m going to do for the day.

Like, you know, what’s my, you know, what’s. The source spirit, my higher self want me to do in terms of how do I serve today, like all of that stuff, but not in terms of like having fun with breakfast and some of this, the more habitual things that I noticed, but then less we are in habits, the more open we are to experiences and the more joy we can get out.

So thank you for that. I appreciate that. I’m going to try that tomorrow and see what. I hope don’t hear oatmeal

Alexis: again. . I did that today actually. I had I made myself, this was something I did for the first time. I made berry and cream cheese stuffed french toast for breakfast this morning.

It wasn’t as hard as it sounds. Just go on Pinterest. But I had been, you know, I was like, I would [00:40:00] really like, you know, and I was not super energetic this morning, but I was like, Nope, I’m gonna do it. And I did it and it was like, Oh, this is delightful. This is right. So yes, I definitely encourage you to explore that.

Yeah, for sure.

Gissele: Yeah. So thank you for that. one of the other things that I found with COVID was It just got us out of our usual habits, like we couldn’t go to the same workplaces, we couldn’t do the same things, we had to completely shift, and so from my perspective, it was something that needed to happen in terms of like our consciousness.

I was wondering is there anything you’re seeing for 2024 how our maybe consciousness may be changing or what people should be considering or doing anything in terms of

Alexis: 2024. I mean, I, so I did this practice.

This is, this will be a little story and it will explain. Yeah, yeah. I love stories. [00:41:00] So I did this practice called Omen Days, which it’s the, you’re, it’s a Celtic practice, that the 12 days of Christmastide or Yuletide, each day you look for signs and each of the 12 days corresponds to a month of the year.

Oh, cool. It is it is it’s it’s kind of fun and it’s kind of I’ve never done it before a few people that I knew were doing and I was like, you know, and I’m just going to do it. See what comes up. And I noticed a couple of things that came up in this, this,

 it was a sign to me that I should do that. That I should have, like, a kind of ritual bath and kind of shifting into the next month and the next focus. And I think that having, I think that’s 1 thing that I think.

Is a good idea. Now, it doesn’t have to be a bath for you, but but thinking about honoring the [00:42:00] transition and making it sacred to us to some degree. I think bringing sacredness back into our regular life daily life is a really powerful thing because it helps ground you. It helps bring you into the present moment and it helps you recognize the beauty and the divinity in the everyday.

Another thing that I noticed, or another sign that kind of came up for me was this urge to embrace your zone of genius and to do the things that you recommend to other people. I think a lot of times we, we don’t. Honor those things for ourselves. We downplay the things that we’re really good at and our own power.

And so I was urged to do that in a big way for [00:43:00] myself. And I think that that’s something that’s really powerful for everyone. And I, and I think that, yeah, really honoring your own power and, and stepping into it. Mm-hmm, and embracing it. That would be a beautiful thing. And I think it would be really great if more people did it.

So I hope that anyone, that’s watching, listening to this will, will do that. I would love for that to be true. Oh, that’s,

Gissele: that’s, it’s so beautiful. Thank you for that. I definitely think that 2024, like, I feel like, I feel like there’s been such a shift in consciousness, like, that I think we’re starting to really understand how much we’ve given away our power to other people and other things.

So what you’re saying really resonates with me because I think that’s the sense that I’m getting that it really is about people stepping up into our own power and that’s why you’re seeing all of these. [00:44:00] Systems are being rocked and there’s just don’t working anymore. And so we’re trying to figure out, okay, so if not that, then what?

And so for me, it really is about understanding the role. Love and compassion play. Because this is just what resonates with me. Doesn’t have to resonate with others. It’s just that the role, the importance of that as the foundation of what we may be wanting to build moving forward. But I definitely. The changes that I hadn’t seen before, even my kids comment on the fact that they really seen some, they’ve seen some changes over time, in terms of how people are, the things that are coming up and sometimes even in extremes, like streams in behavior and the positive or it seems to behave you in the negative, but everything seems to be coming up to, for the light to be shine, like shown on, right.

But sometimes we don’t. Like we’re seeing it’s [00:45:00] an interesting time doesn’t interesting time to be

Alexis: alive. Right. Cause you’re like,

Gissele: what is times when I think to myself, sometimes the things we worship prioritize like this world is so topsy turvy. Doesn’t it not sometimes feel like this world is a little bit like the upside down.

Like the things we prioritize, the things we care about, the things we like when I go deep into myself and spirituality, like in, in terms of like in my heart, like when I really go inward, like the things that I think generate real love in me, I like all in experiences in the present moment and just like little tiny things that are so that made me feel so abundant and make me feel so thankful to be alive.

And then I’m like, well, why am I not [00:46:00] taking note of that in my every day? Like, why do I allow all of these other things to take my energy and attention when they’re not as important? Or maybe they are. I mean, they are important because I mean, we’re living this experience, but I guess I think just sometimes the things we value don’t make any sense

Alexis: to me anymore.

It’s true. I mean, it’s true. And I think that goes back to that internalized capitalism. I mean, it’s just like the values are just totally backwards because, because yeah, we’re, we’re social creatures. We need to do social things. We need to be with, with our people and, and yeah, and relishing those experiences.

That we can, that we can make. And I think when we get in touch with ourselves, when we, when we honor our power and we, we bring sacredness into our, into our life, then we start to see that, that shift even more. And I think you’re right. I think more people [00:47:00] are you know, embracing these things. And sometimes it’s, I mean, it starts with the little ones.

But it just builds and it compounds and it’s it’s really lovely to see,

Gissele: you know, one of the things that you mentioned is that internalized capitalism, and I try to think of systems in terms of like, how I contributed to those systems and how sometimes those systems reflect how I acted when I was hurtful.

Do we not buy into the whole capitalist. I think hook, line, and sinker. at least I did. Like, I think when I think back about these systems we have created and how we’ve contributed to them, I’m like, you know, it’s sort of like the terminology that we no longer use, that we used to use.

We’re like, remember when we used to say that? That’s so inappropriate and hurtful. What were we thinking? Yeah, it’s, you know, but hindsight is always

Alexis: 20 20, right? Yeah, totally.

Gissele: Strange times. [00:48:00] I was wondering if you could tell people a little bit about what you’re working on where they can find you. I know you have potentially a special offer for these listeners so I don’t know if you want to share that with people.

Alexis: You can you can find me on alexisdonkin.com. I’m also on Instagram and TikTok a lot.




I love DMs, so feel free to reach out and message me. I’m happy to chat with you about all the things, and you can, I did I, I do think that one of the best ways to work with me is to just. Do an ask a psychic session and the reason is that it’s basically a conversation like we’re having and you just, it’s just like one question.

Really? It’s like 20 minutes. It’s only 30 bucks. And, and if you mentioned this podcast, we’ll also get a chat day [00:49:00] later and. That can be helpful because sometimes the things that come up during a conversation, maybe things develop over time. And so then you can chat with me and be like, hey, this thing came up like, what do you think?

But regardless, when you leave the conversation, you will definitely have your, a clear next right step, you’ll feel affirmed, you’ll have assurances about your trajectory of where you’re going. And it just feels Good. So I’d love for you to take me up on that. That would be super great. Remember to reference this awesome podcast.

Because Giselle is fabulous in this conversation was so fun. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah.

Gissele: Yeah. So, oh, I do have 1 more question, which is what is your definition of unconditional love? I’m asking all my guests, regarding what their, what their perspective of, of love or unconditional love. Some people don’t define it as unconditional, but [00:50:00]

Alexis: well, it’s, it’s love.

I would say that unconditional love is love. Despite. It doesn’t matter. Right? It’s, it’s love for all of, all of the whole package. Conditioned love you, you, you love because, but the love despite is so much more powerful.

Gissele: Yeah, I love that you said that because you’re right. It’s the because versus.

Despite. Yeah. Oh, what a beautiful way to end the podcast. And thank you everyone to tune in, who tuned into our podcast today. Don’t forget to like, and subscribe for more amazing content and join us another time for the love and compassion podcast with Gissele. See you soon.

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