Ep.45 Healing with Love after a Loss – A conversation with Lovemore.



Gissele: Hello, and welcome to the love and compassion podcast with Giselle. We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives in our world. Don’t forget to click subscribe for more amazing content. On today’s podcast, we’ll be talking about the power of love and helping us heal after loss.

 Today, we’re speaking with coach Lovemore McLaughlin, who decided to start living after losing her mother. she had numerous challenging moments in the restaurant business and decided to focus on helping people be more compassionate and loving towards themselves.

Today, she is a vibrant example of how to live your life with gratitude, joy, and love. Please join me in welcoming Coach

Lovemore: Lovemore. Welcome, welcome everyone who’s tuning in and Giselle, I always start with gratitude because it is so much who I am. So I just want to extend gratitude for this moment and thankfulness for you inviting me on and I [00:01:00] celebrate in this moment. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank

Gissele: you.

Thank you. Thank you. I was wondering if you could start by telling us a little bit about your story in how you actually ended up deciding to coach people on self love and

Lovemore: self compassion. Thank you. So the chapter of my story that I will share right now, because there’s so many chapters. Just before COVID, I just was this close to having like one of the biggest meltdown and I thankfully had the vacation that I’ve always wanted for 18 years.

Yes, I did say 18 years. I got a moment to catch myself. I got a moment to allow my brain to get to a spot where I could think for myself. Thankfully through R. E. S. T. and I, I knew that I needed a lifestyle change. I [00:02:00] knew that I had to take different actions. And I knew that I had to start seeing myself.

Because for 18 years, I saw everyone else. But I couldn’t see myself and I had to start giving myself attention. I decided to honor my late mother’s name. So hence I changed my name on all social media platform to love more. And literally Giselle, I said, you know what, with this beautiful legacy and name, let me.

Cultivate a love more lifestyle. And once I realized I was blooming so much to the point where people really could not keep up with the transformation, but it was a beautiful experience. I knew in my heart that moving forward, giving my age. My life has to be more purposeful and more meaningful. So I sat down with myself and [00:03:00] asked myself the question, What am I doing with the lessons, the legacy, and the experiences from my pain?

And I recall a mentor said to me, Do not lose. Do not waste your mother’s pain that is always etched in my, in my mind. Do not lose my mother’s pain. Do not lose, do not waste my pain. Every time I’m going through a battle, those are the words I hear in my mind. And I knew that I had to be that voice and vessel to share my experiences.

If it’s even for one woman, right, men as well, you know, we can’t forget or men as well. Even though my main target audience are female entrepreneurs or love more programs and experiences and my messages is not limited to women alone. Love is for everyone. [00:04:00] And it’s first the message of love, which I do in my personal and my brand as well.

So I wanted to share my voice with women, especially women who. Are where I was because it’s so easier for me to share because I was there. So that’s the short chapter of that story,

Gissele: Giselle. Thank you for sharing that. I was wondering if you could also share what your life looked like before your mom passed away.

And then like after because you were living a very different life, right? Like it was very It seemed really stressful. So I was wondering if you could

Lovemore: share. Absolutely. Before, before my mother passed, I wasn’t a communicator. And it was, it wasn’t like, Oh, you can do better. It was, I can really say that I wasn’t the best communicator.

I kept everything inside. And I recall my mom saying to me at nine, I’ll always worry about you because [00:05:00] you do not have a voice. I was I was voiceless. If something was bothering me, it was easier for me to just hold it in and I kept holding things in, holding things in. I mean, I was very close to exploding.

I wasn’t sleeping properly before COVID. I was getting two hours max sleep and I was so tired. Yeah, I was so tired when I would go into my bedroom. It was just when I came home from the kitchen, it was enough time to shower. And a shower for me was like the biggest blessing ever. It was how I rejuvenated myself.

And then I would just Just lie on the bed because I was too tired to sleep, but just to lie, to rest, to feel some sort, like, like I’m a human or something. And that was my life before, no sleep, always rushing, always rushing to have a conversation. I could not [00:06:00] stop. To pause, to breathe, to catch myself, and to be present with you, to lean in, to look in the eye, and just have that human human connection, interaction.

I did not know how to do that. I wasn’t sleeping, I wasn’t eating properly, I was taking care and feeding others so well, and I wasn’t nourishing my physical body and the rest of myself. No, after, after COVID and after the lifestyle change, I noticed the peace. I have to say that word, the first word that I have to tell you that I experienced, I experienced this peace and I call the joy, I call it joy, bliss, because it was so beautiful.

It’s beyond, it’s so beautiful, it’s so beyond me, it’s almost like I don’t even always have the right words, but it was blissful, it was peaceful. I started to be… Honest with myself, which in turn allowed me to communicate better. I became a [00:07:00] better communicator. I would reflect more. So it allows me to stay present and not bring things that doesn’t serve me into the next day or the future.

So I, I became, let me deal with things now, check it off, action it, not let it pile up because before everything would pile up. The good, the bad, things that I need to clear. Everything was piling, piling, piling, piling, piling. Then I was close to a point of exploding. And I did explode one morning. And I’m thankful that I got the opportunity to witness my own change.

It’s peaceful, it’s beautiful, it’s vibrant. I am so honest with myself. I’m more forgiving of myself and all these beautiful attributes allow me to be compassionate to others, to listen. Not to preach to others, but to listen, and my aim is just to [00:08:00] be there. I am the love that will stand beside you and just love you.

Someone else want to preach, you’re going to have to find someone else to preach to, because I, I’m not that person.

Gissele: Beautiful. Beautiful. The the food industry where you come from can sometimes be seen as a very highly stressful environment. And maybe not always the healthiest of environments in terms of the pressure that maybe chefs feel and people that working in the restaurant industry.

Can you share a little bit about what it was like working in that environment and how. Maybe the work that you’re doing as a chef now shifted

Lovemore: on. Yes, it was. There’s so many. There’s so many moving pieces. It’s a fast paced industry. And for me personally, I wasn’t taking the time. To step back, pause in the moment and to look in, like stand on a mountain and say, zoom in on your [00:09:00] life, Shereen, love more, zoom in and look, look, this is what you’re doing.

This is what’s happening. I wasn’t reflecting, I wasn’t pausing, I wasn’t asking myself and really saying to myself, okay, where do I want to be in five years, ten years? Not from, a lot of times we ask a question from a financial perspective. But not from a holistic perspective, what do I want my mindset to be?

What would I want my self care lifestyle to look like? What do I want my peace to look like? I never was asking any of those questions. So of course, if you’re not asking the question, if you’re not intentional about making change. You know, there’s a saying, nothing happens if nothing happens, nothing change if nothing changes, right?

So, I wasn’t even stopping, it was just like a constant cycle of go, more burnout, more stress, no self care, no taking the [00:10:00] moment to be present and to pause. And it kept going and going and it just kept building up and building up and building up and it was just not healthy. Whereas now… I check in on myself every single day before I open my bedroom door.

It’s a practice that helps me. It allows me to be consistent with being present with where I’m at, which in turn allows me to be the best me for me, my daughter, and my community. So it is a win win situation. I’m still learning. I’m still learning, I’m still growing, but it is, it is with intention, it is with care and learning to be gentle, give myself grace and be compassionate and forgiving.

Gissele: Beautiful. I love what you said about the holistic approach to life because you know, what you said was so spot on. I think people like, for example, if they’re [00:11:00] focusing on abundance, they’ll tend to focus on abundance, the financial abundance, but we’ll miss like the, the family abundance, the health abundance and all those pieces until things are out of balance, right?

Maybe they find the abundance, but then the other areas are lacking. And so creating an overall life, like an abundant life. I think it is really, really important. You mentioned that in your journey, you were able to tap into and find this amazing peace and joy. What helped you in particular to be able to tap into that joy?

Because your previous experience was one of, you know, not having a voice and being highly stressed and, you know, and, and then being able to tap into that many of my listeners would love to know how to tap into that for themselves. Absolutely.

Lovemore: Absolutely. It’s… It’s consistency with the right things that serve you.

So, this journey started in 2015. So, I became highly consistent with gratitude. [00:12:00] And even if I was having a challenging moment, I would sit and say, I get to. I get to, you know, bend and tie my shoelaces. I, I never miss the small things that sometimes we take for granted. I would see someone in a wheelchair.

I would extend compassion and then I’ll come home and I’ll pray and be thankful that I have my legs. I never missed the opportunity to say, I wake up and I get to see my daughter. I never missed the opportunity to turn on the tap. Every little thing that I do, I extend it to gratitude. And I say, I get to, I get to sit in this moment and have this conversation, everything I never miss.

So even through a painful and difficult moment. I always go back to gratitude and how I reframe the situation. I get to bloom more. I get to witness the lessons [00:13:00] in this experience. It’s not pretty at the moment. But I get to experience, you know, the beauty and the blessing and the lesson of knowing that I’m here, but I’m going to be on the other side, which is even more beautiful.

So gratitude is such a huge part. And the other thing that I do is I wake up to do all the things that I love. I love beautiful, vibrant colors. If I’m going to my part time assignments. Wherever it was city, I pack the stuff I love. I pack my love signs. The other thing that I do is my bedroom. Every corner of my bedroom is bright colors.

Yellow for sunshine. There is love. There’s hope messages. There’s art pieces with… So, we have to remember, most people sleep in a bedroom. We go to bed. We sleep in a bedroom, we wake up, we wake up in our bedroom. [00:14:00] What does our environment look like? Because a lot of times when we talk about feeding and consumption, we often limit that to the food we eat, which we have to eat to nourish ourselves.

But how are we nourishing our soul, which is our mind? How are we nourishing our spirit? How are we nourishing our energy? How are we nourishing our inner child? And I always. Say to myself, how am I nourishing my purpose because holistically, we have to be able to define who we are. That’s going to look different for everyone.

But when I was redefining who I am, I said, I am purpose. I am light. And I have to nourish my purpose and my light, because that is where we bloom the most. When we are meaningful and purposeful and really caring for purpose and the light that we are, we bloom. So it’s consistently. [00:15:00] living a life where I wake up and I give myself permission to do the things I love.

I got up this morning and I said to myself, I’m wearing the hat that I bought last week. I’m not going to let it sit in a drawer like we often do and not get up and dress up and feel good about ourselves. And marry that to the inner work that we’re doing and joining that with the physical things that it’s a beautiful marriage.

So these are some of the things that I do, Giselle. And it’s just, it has, it is, it has brought me so much peace. Sometimes I’m in awe of the peace I sit in or how quickly I get back to peace. And Giselle, I have to share that. Because we live in a world where peace is not something that is easy for some people to find.

And we are all on our own personal journey. And I often say, I want to share this before I pass it over back to you. I always say, we each come with [00:16:00] different wealth. You may have the wealth of faith in this season. I may have the wealth of smile in this season. Another person may have the wealth of encouraging words.

And what we need is to marry and join these different wealth so we can bloom and blossom more. We definitely need each other. And I want everyone to know that you have the unique wealth that can be a blessing. Even if you’re going through a difficulty or a storm, it doesn’t minimize the wealth. That is you.

So I just wanted to share that because sometimes I may need to borrow your wealth of faith or encouraging words just to be able to join mine and for me to bloom a little bit more. So I wanted to share that as well.

Gissele: Thank you. Thank you. I felt that you said so many amazing things. I think the first thing I want to comment on is the.

It adds up, right? So you were talking about being grateful for the little things. I don’t think [00:17:00] people realize that all those little things that you’re grateful for accumulate and adds up over time, right? Like you gain an awareness of how rich and abundant we really are and how rich and abundance, like it’s all around us, right?

And so I think we forget, we get so stuck on lack or what we think we don’t have that we, we miss all the things that we do have. The second thing I wanted to mention was really about, and thank you for mentioning like the fact that you love to you know, like dress up and dress up, you know, like feed your soul.

Cause that’s one of the things that attracted me to you, which is like your vibrant personality and your vibrancy and the sunflowers, which is one of my favorite flowers. Do you know that sunflowers are like the spiritual meaning of sunflowers is like faith in God. Oh, wow. Yeah, it’s actually one of my favorite flowers.

Yeah. So you were going

Lovemore: to comment. Yeah. So, so you see, we, we learn from each other. I’ve, I’ve always [00:18:00] been drawn to sunflower. And I noticed in the last, especially this year. I’ve been using a lot. Sometimes we may not know the meaning for something, but we know it serves us and do us well. But thank you for sharing.

So here we go to identifying what I just shared that we all come with different wealth. Here you are sharing to me that something I had no clue about. I, all I knew was to say this sunflower is too pretty, not to bask in every single day. And here you are sharing, which it now it makes so much sense because.

I’m so heavily. It’s it sits in my sits on my bed every day. I make my bed. What a beautiful thank you for sharing that because now it’s now it amplifies why my soul drawn to this sunflower. Look at this. I even came. I’m like, I bring the sunflower with me. I bring it all this love and light. Beautiful.

Thank you for sharing. Oh

Gissele: my goodness. And I love what you said about the bedroom too, about like, and it’s [00:19:00] so funny. Because there’s so many different environments. We focus so much on like the things that other people see, like our kitchen and our dining room and whatever, but you’re right. Like when we.

Go to bed. Right. And when we wake up, that’s what we’re waking up to. So how are we reflecting the joy that we want to experience? So I love that. I’m definitely going to take that as well as your gift to me in terms of like, how can I turn my, the places that I spend the most. And when I wake up and go to bed, how do I establish that kind of loving environment?

So I really, really love and appreciate that. Awesome. Sorry.

Lovemore: No, I said awesome. Yeah. Yeah.

Gissele: So can you share a little bit of you know, you, you mentioned the being able to forgive yourself what role has forgiveness played in your life and being able to help you be more loving and compassionate towards yourself and

Lovemore: others.

Oh, wow. The [00:20:00] forgiveness was one of the first. process that allowed me to start seeing myself and loving myself. I believe that forgiveness is a pathway to loving ourselves more. I just had to, you know, we have, we sometimes we set so many expectations on ourselves. I have to be this, I have to do this. And I realized that I was being so harsh and I really Realize that even with my, my chef experiences and journey, one thing that I didn’t share was the reason why I ended up in burnout because I didn’t see my value, which affected my pricing and Giselle, I had to learn to heal enough from that journey.

And the healing enough from that journey started with saying. I forgive you. I forgive you for the choices you make. I forgive you for not believing in yourself. I forgive you. I forgive you. So I had to learn to forgive myself enough [00:21:00] to start the journey of seeing myself. And forgiveness is almost like a beautiful floral just opening up.

And every time I forgive myself a little bit more, I saw that I was blooming more and I started to see the beautiful God in me. And the more I started to see the beautiful God in me, I was just like, I was just so encouraged to be me. So sometimes people are like, I can’t understand how come you’re so joyful.

I just started to forgive more, to see myself more, to understand when I look in the mirror I’m seeing God in me and I’m honoring his presence in me. And forgiveness, honestly, was one of the most impactful pathway to my journey of loving more. It allowed me to just like acknowledge where I’m at.

acknowledge the conversations that was not supporting my love pathway and saying, come on, I love more. Let’s deal with this. [00:22:00] So it’s, so it’s, I married forgiveness with self reflection. I would self reflect, I would write, I would say, this is where I’m at. And I would say, is this supporting my future? Is this supporting my purpose?

And when I said no, I’m like, hold on a second, honey, I have to do something about that. Then I would start the process of forgiveness, which is identifying, acknowledging, then slowly releasing. And I must say that it’s not a one day, five second job. It is a process. I am still healing. I’m still on the healing journey.

I must say that I’ve healed enough for a beautiful blossoming transformation, but I will not kid myself to think that they’re not small areas where I can still work on. That’s one thing I learned on my journey never to be so You know, never be too confident to think that, Oh, I’ve got it. I figured it out.

[00:23:00] I’ve learned so much. It’s unlimited. The journey of continuous blooming, it is unlimited. And that’s one thing that I wanted to share. I’m still healing baby, but I’m healing continuously and forgiving myself continuously, which makes it a lifestyle for me. So I wanted to share that as well,

Gissele: Giselle. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. And it’s so true. It’s a journey, isn’t it? It’s a journey of loving ourselves and forgiving ourselves and seeing what you said is. God within us, right? And so what helped you see that? What’s up? You see that connection because I think you know, the majority of people at times feel like, oh, you know, God is over here.

It’s a being outside of us. And it’s like kind of this thing there and I’m here and I’m not worthy of God as we were taught in religion, right? What helped you see the

Lovemore: God within? I must say that. You asked some really powerful questions, and this is one of them. Very, very, [00:24:00] I’m truly, truly loving the questions you’re asking them.

Loving the experience right here, right now. This started, this whole The God in Me started I don’t, I want to get the time correctly. Let’s see. Probably three, maybe four years ago, I was in my bedroom on a Sunday morning, and I was learning to be comfortable with who I am. And I’ve always loved to smile, but a part of me knew inside I was holding back.

And one morning I heard a soft voice. Never be afraid of the smile in you. It’s my smile in you. And I never forgot that moment. I remember I leaped out of bed. And that’s when I had the confidence to look in the mirror. I knew that I was the vessel housing this amazing being I call God. Because we each have our own different perspective.[00:25:00]

It’s so easy for me to look in the mirror. Because when I look in the mirror, I’m like, This is God in me. The smile in me, the posture in me, but it’s just housing this vessel called love more and it makes it so much easier for me when I walk in a room, the confidence, it comes naturally because I’m like, Lord, you guide my stuff.

You guide my smile and the smile, the smile came down with meaning and purpose. Like I’ve always had a smile, but the smile now is like, it has such a sunflower effect. Because I’m like, God. This is you in me. This is the gift that you gave me. I’m not going to hold back on it. This is you and me. When you embrace the God in you, amazing, beautiful things happen.

And as I’m speaking, thank you so much for allowing me to share because. Sometimes we go [00:26:00] through the journey and we witness it, but when you speak it, oh my goodness, I’m in like goosebumps over here because I don’t, I don’t even know if I’ve shared that with anyone else, but I remember it was a Sunday morning and I remember I leaked out of bed.

Because once you say, Hey God, I see you in me, whenever I create with my hand Giselle, I said, Oh my goodness, God, you’re so good. Look at what you create, right? I will, if I, if I, if I’m creating, cause you know, I love florals and I love to, you know, still create stuff and make things beautiful and vibrant.

Every time I create, I step, I step back and I don’t say, Oh my gosh, I’m so great. I said, Oh my goodness, God, look at your hands in me. Look at what your hands created through me. It’s a whole different level. Of appreciation. When you start to reframe things, you start to see how beautiful you are because you see a being inside you that is beautiful [00:27:00] and then you accept that beauty.

It’s a game changer for me. It works for me and I’m sticking with it. Yeah.

Gissele: Yeah. Oh, I’m so glad you share that story. What a beautiful story. I feel like I am on my journey as well is, is seeing the divinity within myself and then being able to see the divinity in other people.

It was when I started to accept. That, oh, you know, I am the vessel of God and then it enables me to see God and other people, right? So how has your journey in terms of seeing God within you helped you see the

Lovemore: divinity in others? Oh, wow. This conversation is getting, oh my goodness.

I wish I could just interview you. I feel like I want to have a chat. Thanks. It’s, it definitely, if I can’t see God in me and in my footsteps, it makes it so much difficult to see the God in others. So it starts with a new journey. I have to see him and know that [00:28:00] he’s, he’s a part of me, especially when I allow him to just, Be the blooming vessel and guiding light in my life.

So the more I see him in me, and the more I am relying on him in my daily path, I can see him in you. I can see, now your smile is not just a smile. Now your smile creates this beautiful burst of energy, which we’re both speaking virtually. But for some reason I feel your presence because my energy is being hugged.

So being able to see him for myself personally, it allows me to see you a little bit, see him more fully in you. So when I’m looking at you, I’m seeing your smile and I’m witnessing his blink in your eyes and you’re tilting your head. I’m noticing all of that. And it’s such a [00:29:00] beautiful thing, but what’s most powerful is the energy and feeling.

Energy never lies. It’s true. And it’s, you know, it’s this peace and beautiful abundance and I feel so hugged and you’re speaking from such a pure place. I can feel it. Your questions are so divine. This is such a beautiful, you know, such a beautiful moment. You’re going to make me weep. This is, this is I have to tell you, I these conversations are watering my soul.

Like, thank you for, this is more than a podcast. This is just an experience. It is an experience. Thank

Gissele: you. Thank you. Thank you. I was gonna ask about you know what you were saying and being able to see the divinity in one another. I think it really does help us shift away [00:30:00] from the story of being a victim, right?

Because often when we don’t see the divinity within ourselves, we see ourselves Giselle affected by other people’s behavior the more that we tap into that divinity, the more that we see kind of unlimitedness how has seeing the, the, the, the God within you helped you shift away from some of the, the love more focused, like, you know, cause sometimes we’re so body focused.

Yeah. Or self-focused, not that, I mean, self-love is important. So it, it’s not that that narcissistic focus I’m talking about. Sometimes we get so focused on the smallness of this body or the limit of this body that we sort of forget how divine we are. Can you talk a little bit about that?

Lovemore: Absolutely. What’s coming up for me is I. I always just speak from my heart and draw reference. I remember I was going through a difficult time and a [00:31:00] sister of mine said, God is never overwhelmed. He’s never lost. Yeah. God is never overwhelmed. He’s never lost a battle. So it speaks to the grandiose, the unlimitedness of the Lord.

And whenever I’m going through a storm. I always say God is never overwhelmed. And there’s a song by Torren Wells. He’s not, he’s never lost a battle. And what that does for me is it sets, it sets the precedence. It’s like, you know, it’s, it’s God in God first. He’s my creator. He’s unlimited, infinite. You know, it’s just like one thing I always learned.

I learned as well to change. I, you’ll never hear me say again, the sky’s the limit. I do not use that word. God is, I, you know, we learned, we learned that we learned that growing up as children, right. And then we take it into our adult. And then when I [00:32:00] met God, I said, God, you are my limit. He is my limit, not the sky.

He created the sky. So it is, it’s again, it’s always about perspective. And even though we don’t fully understand him because we never created him, he created us. I knew that there’s this unlimited abundance. It’s infinite. It’s above our own understanding. Like words can’t even fully describe him. We only know him this much, right?

But his Being in his world is beyond us. Sometimes it just makes my head spin. But seeing and knowing God is never overwhelmed. He’s never lost a battle. That’s the mindset I use. And honestly, sometimes I have to sit with myself and just say that. Because sometimes the situation is so overwhelming. You just need that reminder, like, who is your source?[00:33:00]

Remember there’s source and there’s resource. So it’s always going back to the facts and the truth. And we all, as I said, we all have different beliefs, but my truth is the Lord. My truth is God. He is. Unlimited? He’s unlimited, like he created this world and I have to remember that God is unlimited. That’s the source I want to tap into, not into my unlimited belief, because sometimes our belief is unlimited, but God is.

You know, ever, ever, ever keep on going always promising. So those are my thoughts.

Gissele: Yeah, thank you. I wanted to ask some questions that I know my listeners are going to ask. some of the people that I know and some of the listeners have maybe in the past put faith in God and then feel like there was no reply or there was no, like, you know, their miracle didn’t happen or they lost someone, especially during COVID.

COVID was a really [00:34:00] challenging time for a lot of people.

What do you say to those people that say, well, maybe God shows up for you, but he didn’t show up for me when I needed him, whatever time.

Lovemore: Yeah, yes, Giselle, I’m just going to be totally honest. I’ve had someone who lost their child and she was, you know. Not understanding. I’m gonna be honest with you in a situation like that.

I do not preach I do not say because sometimes I myself as the Lord sometimes I’m driving. I’m talking to the Lord. I’m like Lord I don’t know. I do not understand this like what’s happening here. I have to Remind myself. I’m beyond the full understanding so whenever if someone comes to me I’m going to try to figure out where they are mentally.

Are they ready for, what conversation are they ready for? They may not be ready for, they may just want to be held. I don’t know if [00:35:00] you know this song by Casting Crown, Just Be Held, I’ll hold that person. What do you want to say? I’ll listen, but I may not respond in the moment because the response may not be the right time.

So Giselle, I say this to say that. Sometimes if someone comes to me with a God conversation and I feel like I don’t even have the answer right now, I’ll just say, you know what, what would you like to share? I’m here to listen. I’ll, you know, I’m a huggy person. I’ll hug and I’ll hold them. If there’s a moment where I feel as if I can share from where I’m coming from at another time, I will, you know, I will do that.

But if someone is going through the most difficult loss in the freshness of that, I will hold back on. Saying what I want to say, because it may not be the right time. And to be quite honest, I may not even have the answer. Someone comes to say, why did the Lord take my son? And why did the Lord, why did I go through [00:36:00] cancer?

Why am I going to think that I have the answer for that? I, I, I’ll probably say, you know what? I, I’m here for you. How can I support you? What are the things can I do to make you feel better? Those are the questions I would ask. I’m not going to try to answer a God question because I’m over here with my own God questions like the Lord, why, but I often pray and like, Lord, give me the strength to go through what you’re taking me through and give me the mindset and the wisdom to understand that this is preparation and give me that strong conviction to know that I’m getting through.

to a much more beautiful place, even though my eyes can’t see it. Lord, let me trust in you. Giselle, it’s not an easy, easy journey. I don’t want to tell anyone that it’s so easy. The more you see the Lord work [00:37:00] ways, and I sit and I remember how far I’m coming, how it was difficult for me to hold a conversation.

And now here I am, I have enough strength in him and confidence in him, I can walk in a room, I can hold my head up high, and I can look you in the eyes and not hold my head down. So, we have to have more personal evidence that he has come through for us, and he’s going to continue to come through for us.

So, if someone wants to ask us to wrap up, I will identify where they’re at, maybe they just need to be held. out for a long time. No preaching. I love you. You know, love has a way of just pouring into the cracks and the emptiness and the loneliness. And that’s why I chose love more. There were people that loved on me.

It was such a great experience. I [00:38:00] promised myself, I am going to love forward this love because it’s so good. So love has a way of just filling in the pieces and the cracks, and it’s almost like you’re pouring into an empty vessel. Love has a way of just expanding and filling those empty places. So I would love over preaching.

I would listen over a lecture and I would hug until. There’s a time to have a conversation, but it would be a conversation that’s going to put that person in a better frame of mind. So until I feel like I can have that conversation from my understanding and where I’m at of the Lord, I probably would not say anything.

I would just hug, listen, embrace, and hug some more. And when the person’s ready for a little bit more, maybe I even suggest someone they can talk to that has. [00:39:00] More knowledge of the Lord than I do because we have to know that we don’t know everything and they’re experts and they’re people who know a little bit more than myself in certain areas.

I may just say, you know what, let me, let me suggest someone that I believe that is a perfect person, or let me suggest someone who’s gone through your journey and know there are 10 years over into that experience. Maybe their 10 years getting here is better. So maybe it’s just providing the resources.

Maybe it’s just going to the source for me, who is the Lord and say, Lord, she’s asking me questions and I have no idea. I don’t want to trigger her. I want to love on her. Can you guide me through? So that would be my response. I’m not sure if that makes sense, but that would be my response to that. Yeah.

Gissele: Yeah. What a beautiful response. And, you know, a lot of things came up for me. The first one is, you know it’s the place [00:40:00] of non judgment. Right. Yes. Like you’re, you’re willing to witness their divinity. You’re willing to in, in love is God or source, right? I think you, you’re extending love, you’re extending God.

So for me, I think that’s the best thing that you can do is just be for, be there for someone, hold them and love them. And love has such a transformative power. I’ve experienced it myself with people that sometimes if you just love them. Like it has a transformative thing. You don’t even have to do anything.

It’s just an extension of love that people either, either they’ll align to it and accept it, or they’re just kind of like, Oh, too much for me. See ya. And so, so love has this kind of transformative way. It comes from a place of nonjudgment. That’s true compassion. It’s this nonjudgment, this allowing to honoring that person’s emotions and experiences and acknowledging that that’s what they’re going through.

And you’re right, we have such a limited perspective from our mind, right? [00:41:00] Like we only see this much we don’t see, because if we’re truly the divinity within us, then we’re unlimited, there is no death, there’s just transition. But those conversations are not the time to be having when somebody is in the middle of grief.

And so knowing Instead of thinking about what this person, what conversation should be having, what do you need in this moment and can I be a vessel for it? You mentioned faith, which can be really challenging when things where, you know, when things take time or when, you know, you don’t see it out there.

What keeps you in your faith in your most

Lovemore: challenging moments? Giselle, sometimes I have to borrow faith from others. which is something that I’ve learned. I’ve learned that I don’t have to be strong all the time. I’ve learned that, as I said earlier, we all come, we all come with different wealth. [00:42:00] And if I’m feeling like I need faith and I do not have enough, Trust me, I’m going to call someone, I’m going to borrow their faith, because sometimes you just need to be in the presence or just have a conversation with someone who has what you need.

I’m okay borrowing the faith. I’m okay borrowing. I had to learn. That I’m okay borrowing your hope when I am not so hopeful. And sometimes we don’t even have to have a conversation. I could just like scroll on your page and I see you sitting in a fountain of hope. And I sit there enough and you just feel a little bit better.

So we have to just learn to be wise and intentional. And know who has what we have, what we need, I should say. And listen, I have borrowed people faith, I have gone in and sat down with my pastor, and when I, when I leave, I’m just like, whoop! You just, you, you, [00:43:00] sometimes all we need is just to sit in the presence of the right person, because remember, God is with us, right?

And God knows that I’m, I’m, I’m going to my pastor. You know, to have a conversation, he’s going to just like pour into the pot to make sure he has the right position, the right words. So I borrow from others and one of the, one of my most sacred places where I feel the Lord the most is by the lake and I want to share this when I go to the lake or I’m out in nature and I hear the birds chirping and I look up at the sky and I see I see the unlimitedness of God.

I see that He’s just ever so giving. And when I go to the lake, I don’t know the signs behind it, beside it, in it, but it’s almost like the water washes my, my mind. It’s almost like the water is a sponge. [00:44:00] And it’s like, come on. Whenever, whenever I leave, it’s almost like you took a shower. Like the longest shower, you feel squeaky clean, that’s helped me with my faith because the Lord connects with me there and he takes away my concerns.

So I always say, you know what, that’s where I go to cast my cares. Anytime I have a cast in my care situation, I go to the lake first. And if I need some extra support. Then I’m like, who is the person I need to reach out for this? Who is the, who is the, who has the faith right now in this season? And who can speak to me from a place of love?

I, I, when I’m going through a storm, Giselle, I do not, I do not want a lecture. Mm-hmm. wait until I’ve come through a certain position for you to [00:45:00] lecture me if I need lecturing. Mm-hmm. But whenever I am fragile and my faith is a little bit low, A lecture is going to break me even more because I know who I am.

So I run to the league and then I have, I call them my Pelotons. I will just look at my Peloton list, see who has the, who has the capacity to pour into me. Because I want to be poured to from a place of love. And then I just borrow. It’s okay to borrow. I’ve borrowed so much, but it allows me to bloom because I know that someone is going to come and borrow from me too.

So we, it’s okay to borrow. It’s okay to give. It’s okay to, to share. It’s a whole part of the, the love journey. So whenever my faith is low, I have no hesitation to borrow enough until I can run to the lake and go gather some more. Yeah.

Gissele: Wow. That’s very powerful. Because you are basically. Acknowledging to yourself what you need in the moment.

And then you’re [00:46:00] saying, you know, you talked about source and resource, right? Like how, how do I get, how am I able to tap into that divinity, that, that faith, that love and being able to support each other through this journey. Isn’t that what it’s about? Like, if not, we probably would have incarnated here just by ourselves.

So I think we’re all here to help each other, to, to love each other, to grow. And to kind of help each other resource, because the more you get from other people, the more you have to give, which is absolutely beautiful. Yeah. And, you know, you speaking of nature I will say, you know, there’s, there’s so much you know, like there’s on the one hand, there’s that regenerative power that comes from nature.

There’s that, that. You know, unlimited ness. And then there are these genuine fears of what we’re doing to nature and how much we’ve taken away and continue to do. And so for me, this conversation was yet again, an important reminder of how important [00:47:00] that aspect of us is that that divinity and nature and how important it is to to protect it and take care of it.

Wonderful. Yeah. I was wondering if I’m just gonna, so this is kind of my A couple more questions. The first one is as part of this kind of new season of our podcast, I’m asking all of my guests to tell me what they think Unconditional Love is.

Lovemore: Wow.

Unconditional Love is preparing my mind, my heart, and my soul to sit in this, in this moment. And if there’s… If I see that there’s judgment coming up in this moment because I just wanted to stay present, I acknowledge that and I deal with it throughout the day. I either, you know, Lord, I please, I [00:48:00] ask you for forgiveness.

We don’t want to kid ourselves and say that unconditional love is so easy. It is not easy. It is, for me, it is the mindset, it is the practice that the more I practice, To see you, to love you without conditions, the easier and the closer I’m going to get to that part, you know, just like saying, I will never tell someone I’m fully healed.

Because that option and possibility is so on, you know, it’s unlimited and there’s always like more healing and more healing. So unconditional love for me is having that mindset that I’m going to catch myself and be honest. So it’s honesty. It’s being honest with myself to say. I’m judging you because my heart is going to speak the truth.

Unconditional love is connecting to my [00:49:00] heart and having my heart lead and say, Love more, your mind is judging her and your heart is saying, is telling you that you’re judging her. So unconditional love is being honest with myself, is catching myself, and it’s the action. We can’t say we’re going to practice unconditional love and I don’t go home tonight before I go to bed and say, Lord.

You know, I was judging Giselle all, all this time. I thought she was, she was this and that and look how beautiful she is. I’m going, even if I don’t tell you Giselle, I have to have that honesty. This is why I sit in a lot of peace. Because every night I look into my day, Lord, I missed the opportunity to be kind to Giselle today.

Forgive me. And not, I’m not going to ask for forgiveness a hundred times and not take some action to say, I need to do work on that. So Unconditional Love is catching ourselves, being honest with ourselves, doing to work to ensure that [00:50:00] we are truly moving forward more and more and more to loving. without the condition.

So I don’t know if there’s any human on this earth who can say I totally love without conditions. But what I would love to hear and say is I am being mindful, I catch myself, and I’m committed to learning and serving and learning more because it’s a journey. It is the journey.

 And I say to myself, I want to be a better person because God is love, God forgives, God doesn’t judge, and I just want to, Lord, I want to be more like you.

If you really, if we really can be honest with ourselves and say, I’m loving without conditions. It’s not always easy, but it’s been intentional and I’m going to commit to this. I’m going to catch myself when I find that I did not love you today with, you know, without conditions. It is the me thing. [00:51:00] It’s me from the perspective of let me see where I’m at.

Thanks. And it’s the practicing, it is getting better, and it’s focusing on the love that the Lord exudes, and wanting to be more like Him. That’s my answer, and I stick with it.

Gissele: Yeah, no, that’s, that’s so powerful. The willingness is, is huge. I think people underestimate what willingness is.

That’s a beautiful way to answer that question. The last question is sharing more about you. Tell where people can find you where they can come work with you. Tell us about your website, please. Go

Lovemore: ahead. Oh, awesome. Well I must say again, thank you so much. This has just been such a beautiful, rich conversation and just really setting me up for a more winning week.

I just love the conversations. You can find me courtesy of my website, [00:52:00] lovemorelifestyle. ca. I’m on Instagram daily and on my stories daily for Instagram. So that’s lovemorelifestyle. ca. Style coaching. I’m also on Facebook. Love more Sharon McLaughlin, or if you find any one of those, you can reach out to me and then I can remind you as well, where all the places to make it easier for you, wherever you are in this beautiful globe.

Thank you for tuning, tuning in and listening to Giselle and I, and I do hope that you connect with us. Let us know, where are you on, on your journey? I, I, Giselle, I wanted to, this is what I want to share. I am just here to share my journey, my experiences. I’m here to connect, connect to the wealth that others bring.

And I want us to do this. I want us to come together and I want us to realize how much we need each other. So what I do is… [00:53:00] Over and beyond coaching is I have a passion for bringing in community together. I have a passion for reminding others that you are a leader in the uniqueness that God has created you to be.

And no one can take that away from you. So I want to encourage leaders to say stand up because you have a light, you have purpose. And it’s more and above. coaching package. It’s about bringing community together. It’s about sharing our light and love and it’s encouraging others. Let love be your GPS. So When you’re ready, if you’re ready, even if you’re not ready and you think, you know what, let me just follow this path, you can connect with both of us because we are love hearted and we are practicing love, learning love, and wanting to get more and more into that part where we’re practicing love with all conditions.

And remember, it’s a lifestyle. So

Gissele: thank you so, [00:54:00] so much. And thank you everyone for tuning in to another episode of the loving compassion podcast, which is so bye.

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